


Acting Out (FFoZ S1E1)

by J_Shute



Series: The Fantastic Foxes of Zootopia [3]
Category: Fantastic Mr. Fox, Sing (2016), Zootopia (2016), アグレッシブ烈子 | Aggressive Retsuko | Aggretsuko (Anime)
Genre: Acting, F/M, Humor, Justice, Mental Health Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Undercover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-06-02 06:52:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 27,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19436197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_Shute/pseuds/J_Shute
Summary: First part in my mega crossover project.After an encounter with a disturbing mammal, Nick has a slight personality crisis, one that Judy is determined to fix. But as he (as usual) has dug himself into a super deep hole, she'll need some crafty tricks up her sleeve to help him out.Namely some acting classes, a bit of grade A hustling, and another bunny fox duo.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> “I felt like I could see everything that had happened, and everything that was going to happen. It was like a perfect pattern, laid out in front of me, and I realised that we were all part of it, and all trapped by it.”
> 
> (From V for Vendetta)
> 
> .
> 
> .
> 
> I’d like to welcome you to my maddest undertaking yet. Fantastic Foxes of Zootopia! This is going to be a tv series inspired piece of work, with multiple (and I mean lots of) fics per season. On FanFic, they'll all be together, whereas on A03 they'll all be apart (so subscribe to the FFOZ series).
> 
> Each part stands by its own, but they all contribute to this grand story. There’ll also be a one-shot collection for all non-canon work (and bonus stuff) that I plan to put out soon. Two prequel fics, ‘‘Different’’ and ‘Baby it’s cold outside’ have already been released, with the first essential reading. It’s where the crossover between Fantastic Mr Fox is first made.
> 
> But we won’t be stopping there! Not only will I be bringing in some favourite fanon characters in series 1, I’ll be doing a crossover with Aggretsuko and a different Disney property in season 1 ALONE! That’s not to mention a certain few crossovers that’ll come into their own later, but are ticking quietly on in the background. I wonder if you’ll be able to find them? Season 2 will really turn the crossover meter up to 11, and you can bet that some crazy stuff then follows in Season 3!
> 
> If this gets done, it’ll be the ultimate king of the crossovers. I hope you’ll all enjoy it, and I welcome you onto this Wilde ride!

**Acting out**

**.**

.

**.**

**Chapter 1**

.

.

Dr Amy Lupuleli’s therapy office was opened late that night. The binturong tended to take extra-long shifts, packing her work load into a few days, before relaxing on those days that were left. It also helped her see certain mammals who liked to stay up late, or who had weekday jobs which they needed to fit their therapy around.

One in particular was a red fox who she’d recently become very accustomed too. Nick Wilde: Police Officer, sarcastic deflector, and a mammal who could ooze confidence yet used to choke up whenever he had to give truly personal information or feelings to people. He could keep it cool and run a complex operation, sweet-talking all the right mammals and playing with the highest stakes, but it would all fall apart if he had to truthfully tell stories about his shady past. He was brave, and could spin the worst insults into funny jokes, but his attempts to reveal his true feelings towards certain co-workers would devolve into an obfuscated mess of self-depreciation and corny lines. Especially when those true feelings were about one co-worker above all else. His partner, and the mammal he had deep unconfessed feelings for, one Judy Hopps.

Because, if there were two big causes of psychological strife in his life, one of them was that bunny.

The other was a certain fox called Nicholas Piberius Wilde.

.

“I need to talk to you about something,” he said seriously, looking over at her as he entered. That was new, and unexpected, and she watched the fox carry on talking as he settled himself down. “-About something that I realised earlier today. Something that’s wrong with me, and I think… -I know, I need to work on.”

“I’m open,” she said, giving a reassuring smile. She had no idea what he’d be saying, but she needed to be prepared for all bases. These kinds of shifts in behaviour could bring up all kinds of psychological curveballs.

“It involved an undercover mission I was on earlier today,” he continued. “Involving some very nasty mammals who _almost_ got away with it.” There was a pause, and a smile then grew across his muzzle. “It might be a bit bleak and dark, but trust me, no good guys were harmed and I think you’ll love the ending.”

Amy nodded. “I think I can handle it.”

“Well….” The fox began, beginning his story….

.

.

_Earlier that day…_

.

.

Dawn.

Zootopia.

A perfectly normal day in the self-appointed jewel in the crown of mammalian civilization. Where everything was normal. Everything humdrum. Where mammals of multiple species just got on with their ordinary lives. The rising sun peeked above the skyscrapers and cast its glow to the streets below. The mammal tide of the night shift was returning home, but already the undercurrent of the morning shift had turned the flow. Doors opened, busses were packed and mammals big and small, young and old, were on their way to where they needed to be.

On that morning a red furred pair exited a taxi in the side streets of Savannah Central, the larger one knocking at a wooden door. He was dressed smart, his trousers finely pressed and his shirt clear, and a well-done tie swung in the breeze. He tapped his maroon foot on the floor, just waiting, as a commotion came from inside.

He wasn’t sure why, maybe it was just a premonition, but he felt the need to hold the free paw of his little companion just a bit tighter. He knew everything would be fine, yet… -No, it was all a silly thought.

With a clatter the door was opened, and a homely looking brown bear greeted them. “Hello Mr Oshiro!” she said, a paw out.

The maned wolf standing in front of her smiled, giving a little bow, before he returned the favour. “Greetings Mrs Kuma,” he said, the bear noticing that, like usual, he barely moved his muzzle as he spoke. Well, it did wiggle around up and down, but his mouth didn’t seem to open up or close at all. She often wondered if he was a ventriloquist in his spare time, though he maintained that he simply worked for an accounting firm. “Though please, call me Ōokami.”

She chuckled. “Sure…” And then, she turned down to the little figure that had been silent throughout the whole event. “Hello little Sagīshi,” she greeted, remembering to draw out the first ‘I’ as if it were an ‘ _ee_ ’.

The young pup looked up at her and smiled, pulling a quick paw up to wave. His fur was a coloured in a mix of dusty brownish-red and greyish-white, slowly maturing into his father's more vibrant hues but still carrying the lingering puppish brown tone that it would have been for most of his first few years. Likewise, he still had a larger head, and arms and legs that were much stumpier, than those his species were generally known for, though he was certainly as lithe and bushy tailed as his dad. Dressed in a green shirt, a pair of grey denim overalls and with a backpack on his back, his other paw held a salmon shaped chew toy tight against him. With his first paw, he slowly put his thumb across his palm and held it all up to his ear, before pulling it out in a long arc, extending his thumb as he did so.

“That’s hello, isn’t it?” the bear asked, the young pup nodding back.

There was a chuckle from his father, who put his paw down onto his son’s head and ruffled up the fur a little. “It is,” he said wistfully. “Isn’t it, you clever little boy?”

Sagīshi nodded, before shuffling up closer to Ōokami, stretching up on his tip toes so that he could rub the side of his head up against his father, just above the larger canine’s hip. A tail came around him, and he panted slightly from the happiness. Mrs Kuma couldn’t help but squeal a bit, shifting around here and there on her feet. It came to an end though as the pup tried to giggle.

He couldn’t, not that he knew.

The joyous squeaks came out more like hacked coughs, and Ōokami stopped the petting with a sigh. “Enjoy your morning with Mrs Kuma,” he said, kneeling down to his son’s level. “Behave. Be polite. Keep yourself clean and tidy.” He paused, before leaning in and giving the bridge of his boy’s muzzle a few parting grooms with his tongue. “Have lots of fun. I love you.”

Sagīshi held his father tight in a hug, his head digging in just over the maned wolf’s hip, with Ookami hugging back, before the younger canine let go and moved one of his paws down, over his heart. All but his two outermost fingers and his thumb went down, and he moved his palm in and out.

Ōokami couldn’t help but sniff and repeat the action, before parting with one last kiss on his cheek. He got into his taxi and off he went, his son happily waving at him as he vanished into the distance.

“Well, little one,” Mrs Kuma announced, smiling as she did so. One of the corners of the grin pulled up just a little, before she carried on. “It’s just you here today, but I think we’re going to have a _real_ lot of fun.” She chuckled as she said it before taking the boys’ paw, almost, but not quite, too low for her to reach, and leading him inside. He entered, toy in tow, and the door closed behind her hard. There was a clicking of a hard lock, a slam of a bolt, and a final, solid, rattling of a chain being locked shut.

…

The inside of the property was vast to the little pup, though it felt a bit cramped for the bear. Being a larger species, that tended to happen quite often. Still, it was good enough. The front of the building was a big open plan kitchen and lounge, the latter stocked up with some daycare facilities. There was a large changing table with a built-in cleaning sink; a chest full of toys; a big bookcase with a mix of books for all ages; a special set of sleeping cribs, arranged like a pull out filing cabinet so multiple mammals could sleep there; and a few massive playpens, with fabric mesh sides. For all intents and purposes, it looked like a well-stocked nursery, one where Sagīshi could play and enjoy the day.

He was set down, on Mrs Kuma’s knee, and she began bouncing him happily up and down as she took his bag and began unpacking it. She spoke in a motherly tone, treated the items being taken out with care and seemed to be perfectly happy with the young pup she was in charge of. In fact, the sweetness to her voice almost felt just a little overbearing, some of her cooing was just a bit more on the nose than usual, and as he was bounced up and down, Sagīshi began to feel just a little uncomfortable. He began wiggling slightly and, as she finished unpacking his bag, he slipped off, landing on all fours.

“That was clumsy, wasn’t it?” his caretaker asked, pouting at him. She booped his nose with her claw before giving a tap on his rear. The pup flinched at it and got up again, before pointing towards the TV. Holding his paw, the other carrying his chew toy, she took him onwards and set him down, pressing play as she went to pack away his things. A spare change of clothes which was good, not that they would be necessary. Some chewy snacks, the kind lots of predator kits and pups enjoyed. A furbrush. She smiled. Those always came in useful. A whiteboard, with a marker pen which she handed over to him before taking the bag and hanging it up. There was one last item in there, a bottle of flea-repellent. Ōokami had warned her that the special pre-school he went to had been having a lot of issues with fleas, and that if she saw him beginning to scratch then she should use it just in case. “School for the deaf,” she pondered out loud. “Of course, you can hear me fine. It’s your voice that’s broken… -You can’t say a word, can you you poor thing _?_ ”

Sagīshi looked back and nodded a little, before trying to hack out a few more words. Nothing came from it.

“What were you trying to say there?” she asked, as he got out his whiteboard and began drawing. She walked over. “Want to tell me something?”

There was a pause, and the pup turned his whiteboard around to reveal a picture of a very fat bear, complete with great big stink marks, and a helpful annotation that quite clearly described her as ‘poopy’.

She frowned and immediately marched forwards. With a yelp, the pup was hoisted up and taken over to one of the sleeping cribs. It was pulled out, he was dumped down onto the stiff plastic sheet, and it was slid back into position. He was locked up, a white plastic mesh separating him from the frowning bear outside. “That was very rude,” she said, shaking her head. “I think you need a bit of time out to think over what you did.”

The maned wolf pup looked out, his paws on the crib’s side and his eyes and mouth trembling, close to tears. On all fours, he wandered back into the pup bed and, grabbing a blanket with one paw and holding his chew toy salmon with the other, he wrapped himself up. His trembling lips broke, and he cried out, sobbing, his vocal chords tangling up to make a sound that wasn’t even a child’s cry, yet seemed even more miserable for the failed attempt. He carried on till he fell silent, lying there peacefully.

Out of sight, Mrs Kuma was smiling as she was joined by another figure, Mr Kuma. They talked together for a little, before she left. Mr Kuma remained though, and he walked up to Sagīshi and, after taking a nervous glance behind him, looked in, the pup looking back.

The big male bear smiled eagerly, before waving at him as he left. “See you soon, little one. You and I are gonna have a lot of fun.”

.

.

Sagīshi didn’t like time out, that was for certain. He’d quietened down just a little and listened in to whatever was being said, ear pressed against the mesh and following the conversation studiously. Holding his salmon tight, nursing its mouth into his face, he heard somebody head back towards him, before seeing Mrs Kuma arrive. She looked in, seeing a pup with eyes that glistened with tears, and smiled. “Looking cute, aren’t you? I think you’ve learnt your lesson now.”

Whatever smile she had was cut off as a sharp knocking hit the door. She flinched, before she quickly opened up the crib and pulled her charge out, depositing him into one of the playpens. Television on, she left for the front door, Sagīshi standing up and looking through the mesh at her. Waiting. There was an odd look of both confusion and hope in his eyes.

“Hello there?”

“Hello,” a male voice came in from outside. “I heard you did… -photography, in here.”

“Uhhh,” she said, suddenly confused, pausing for time. “I’m afraid we’re a daycare…”

He chuckled. “I’m pretty sure you do both.”

“Pardon!?”

“Don’t worry, I’m one of you,” he replied. “One of you.”

“I don’t…”

“-Oh, you do,” he interrupted. His voice went down to a whisper and he spoke up to her. “I know what it’s like to feel that pull, wherever you go and whatever you do. How it gnaws at you, and how you have to control _every_ look. Because every look they give to you might be that look that says, _‘I know what you are’. ‘You’re a monster’. ‘Death is too good for you.’_ And you want to scream at them, _‘I didn’t ask for this!_ ’ And I know how just how liberating it is to give in, to scratch that damn itch! It’s not like they’ll remember it, after all.”

“I should turn you away,” the bear said bluntly, her anger rising. “That… That sounds sick, that sounds disgusting! How dare you!”

“-You should. Buuuuut….. you won’t.”

…

.

.

“Apologies for the front,” she said, as she stepped in to let the newcomer enter, little Sagīshi’s eyes widening as he spotted a red fox standing in front of him. His fur was slick and shimmered slightly, as if oily, while he dressed in a black ostrich-leather jacket, a grubby white top and a pair of blue jeans. The pup and the fox were about the same size, something that quickly drew the newcomer’s attention. He looked over, his head cocking slightly, and the pup reflexively flinched away.

“Hang on just a moment…” he muttered, beginning to walk forwards.

“Hold up!” the bear interrupted, stopping him. “We’re very careful here,” she warned, stretching up and wide. Given how she dwarfed the fox already, and how he didn’t care, he remained unphased. “No, no… -I just want to… -look at him. As you do.”

She paused and smiled. “Sagīshi?”

He remained wrapped up in on himself, even hiding his head with his tail.

“Sagīshi!” she scolded, bringing the furbrush about a just swinging it about a bit, threateningly.

The pup slowly unfurled himself and looked up at the new fox, holding his chew toy tight…

He looked back, looking at the pup’s green eyes for a second or two before smiling just a bit. He gave a long wink, before turning back to the bear. “I’m just looking for a few mementos. The juicy kind.”

“I…” she began, before pausing.

“-What about some fresh and juicy ones…”

She sighed, before shaking her head. “It’s too risky,” she said sternly.

His smug grin faded. “Oh, come on!”

“Listen,” she stated. “If you want to keep some secrets, there are ways of keeping them. “Especially from certain mammals who want to expose our ones!”

“And I’m not trustworthy?” he asked, a hint of desperation in his voice. He raised both palms up to his side as he did so and gave a shrug, along with a happy-go-lucky smile.

“You know what it’s like for mammals like us,” she said, handing him over a card. “We can… -verify you, soon.”

He looked down, tapping a foot on the floor. “How soon?”

“This weekend.”

He glanced over at the pup, whose back was turned to him. “I need it _today_ ,” he stressed. “Preferably _now_.”

She sighed, before frowning. “It can wait,” she stressed. “Tonight.”

“-I can’t do tonight.”

“Then the weekend it is,” she stated, before leaning down with a paw. She began to push him out, and he managed to glance at the pup one last time before his was out of the door.

The bolts and locks and chains went back on. Curtains were closed. A highchair came out, and the bear spared a look at the pup, who was just standing up and staring at her. He sat back down as her husband walked by her, carrying a can of white wallpaper paste. “For the love den,” he chuckled, placing down on a stack of books by the highchair.

Meanwhile, Mrs Kuma picked Sagīshi up, putting him into the highchair. “You don’t want to get all this over you?” she chuckled, patting the tin.

…

Like it would be with any child, it wasn’t long before he was covered in it, the white sticky substance coating him. Mrs Kuma and Mr Kuma looked at each other and giggled, before holding his paw and taking him into the back.

Into a store room.

Into a place where they had a good variety of props and other items, along with some good quality camera stands and recording devices. They were careful mammals to be sure, they had to be. A child might be able to explain that he was abused, or injured, but not so much if he was put into an illusion, showing something he or she didn’t understand.

They made him sit down, as they discussed what they might do. By all means, they could just do stuff that wouldn’t injure him. But, then again, he was young. He was mute. The risks were lower, and they could do some more enticing things with him. They wouldn’t be at risk if they dropped the illusion for him, would they?

As they talked, Sagīshi slowly backed into the corner, as if he could tell that something bad was up. As if he could tell something terrible was about to happen to him. He whined a little, tail between his legs as he shrunk down, ears folding against his head. Holding his little chew toy tight, he began nibbling it, then biting in, then nibbling it again. He kept on doing it, holding the thing tight as the bears turned to him. Looking down at him, their grins growing, he beginning to undress as she got out the furbrush, talking about how he was a really naughty pup for making such a mess. “Someone is going over my knee,” she began. She hit the brush hard into her palm and began walking forwards, scoffing as the pup held his silly little toy as if it would save him. It wouldn’t. He was their play thing now and nothing…

**_KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK_ **

They both flinched, before a look of terror grew on their faces as a female voice hollered out. “ZPD! Open up!”

The female bear turned to her husband, who was already tidying things up. “Don’t bother!” she hissed. “Get out, hide the room, get something on and make yourself look like you’re giving him a clean!”

“What if he says anything!” he urged.

“He’s mute! What’s he going to say?”

They both froze as a new voice, that of a certain famous fox cop, spoke out. “How about Goo-goo Ga-ga, child rutters?”

Together they turned to face him, wide eyed, before both immediately received a tranquiliser dart between their eyes. They didn’t seem to notice though, instead staring bemused at the mammal who’d just spoken, none other than their little maned wolf pup. Wearing a very fox-like grin, he pulled back his chew toy and blew the mouth as if it were a smoking gun. “In-built recorder, radio, tranq gun, and the lips are lined with tabasco to help me cry,” Sagīshi said, in the fox cop’s voice, pulling up a finger in a lecturing gesture as he did so. “When I was a kit, I didn’t have anything this fun!” The bears continued gawking, albeit more due to the tranquilisers at that moment. They stumbled slightly, collapsing backwards, just as the sound of the front door being broken in rang out. There was stomping and shouts and, as they faded out of consciousness, they heard some megafauna mammals reading them their rights and placing them in cuffs. They were past the point where they could be afraid. That could come later.

The last thing Mrs Kuma remembered was a grey blur racing past her. Oddly enough, it seemed like a bunny in a police officer’s uniform. She raced past them, and the other officers, and jumped straight into Sagīshi’s waiting paws.

“I was worried there, Nick.”

He’d felt the same way, and his instincts told him not to say it. But he’d been working on them and, after a steadying breath he spoke out. “I was a little too.”

She let go and just looked at him. He’d been dyed here and there to make him look more like a three year old maned wolf pup instead of a grown fox, his fur had been specially sculpted too, and both he and the civilian helper they were using had covered themselves with each other’s scent to help the illusion when dealing with these bears. But it was most certainly Nicholas Wilde standing there. She couldn’t help but smile at him.

He couldn’t help but smile back.

.

.

.

.

_Looking over, Nick saw the grin on Dr Amy’s muzzle. “I take it you enjoyed that?” he asked._

_“The ending gave a certain satisfaction,” the therapist agreed, before turning back to her pad. “Though, that does beg a certain question. What’s the matter with you now?”_

_There was a slight clearing of his throat, before the fox carried on his story. “It’s something I realised on the way back to the precinct…”_

_._

.

.

.

It wasn’t long before the ZPD were moving in and out of the raided day care. Two hulking Rhino’s entered and, together, they carried out the bear and her husband. Both had little pinpricks between their eyes, the tranquiliser darts that had caused them long since removed. They’d been replaced with pawcuffs around the perpetrator’s wrists, even if they weren’t going anywhere soon. Into the back of a police car they went, the officers looking on with disgust, before they were driven off for booking.

Officer Judy Hopps of the ZPD looked at the car as it vanished around a corner, before looking away. Down. She breathed in and out, before hopping up into the back of her own car. The red furred mammal who’d been dropped off there in the morning was just sitting there, moping. He was the perfect picture of a miserable little maned wolf pup. Staring at the floor, the most pitiable look imaginable on his face. “It’s okay,” she comforted.

He flinched away slightly, huffing.

“You’re safe now.”

“-They couldn’t even get me a coffee?”

Her ears went up, and she looked at the pouting figure. “Hang on…” she began, stuttering slightly. She was cut off though by a finger on her mouth.

“ _TWO_ sicko’s in the pen, and they can’t even get me a large Snarlbucks coffee with caramel and vanilla, with whipped cream and a cherry on top?”

A little smile grew across Judy’s face as she looked at the mammal across from her. Sure, he looked like a maned wolf pup. His fur had been trimmed in a way that made his face look younger, with fur highlights helping. Clothing did a big part too. But, under all that, it was most definitely a fox looking back at her. Her favourite fox in the world. “Nick, if you want a good coffee, I’ll get you a good coffee!”

He smiled. “You always know how to please me,” he said, crossing her arms.

“Yeah,” she replied. “Though you might want a shower first.”

“Oh totally,” Nick agreed, looking down at his clothing. White wallpaper past covered him, the bears using it as a rather convincing substitute for something else. Were it not such a disgusting thing, he might have even been impressed.

He shivered at the thought of the very notion, before a flash of guilt hit him for his previous admiration. He couldn’t help but look at Judy, smiling warmly, ever that ray of sunshine. What on earth would she think if she knew that he’d thought that about the perps?

He glanced away, not wanting to think about that either. Fumbling with his paws, he knew that, were he to explain it, she’d probably get it. She probably wouldn’t see anything wrong about it. He’d been working hard with his therapist on being able to open up about his real feelings and secrets, but here was a simple opinion and he…

“Nick…?”

His ears went down hard. Great, she’d picked up on his internal turmoil. This whole thing had been a blessing and a curse, getting her involved in his opening up.

“If you want to tell me something Nick, it’s okay.”

He bit his lip slightly and glanced down at her, before pushing through. “I was just thinking, about those bears… -they were very clever, impressive even -though-totally-gross-as-well!”

The bunny paused slightly, Nick gulping with worry. “I mean… I was a bit impressed by how they’d planned it too,” she noted. “Our enemies keep on getting smarter, don’t they?”

The fox felt a wave of relief wash over him, managing a smile. “Yeah. Whatever will they think of next?”

“Nothing we can’t outsmart,” Judy smirked, giving him a light pat on the arm. She broke it off though as her phone buzzed.

“That our civy?” Nick asked, referring to the maned wolf who helped the ZPD with the operation. From what he knew, he was an accountant who often found himself short of cash. He helped the ZPD in return for small reward payments.

“No,” Judy replied. “Just a credit card advert. He might be stuck in a meeting or something.”

“Probably,” Nick replied… “Probably…” He looked away, closing his eyes. His mind slowly drifted back to a very unexpected part of the mission. The odd fox who’d come in to the nursery, trying to purchase pictures. Nick shivered from the recollection. It wasn’t just the creep coming in, nor the chance that his undercover operation would be discovered, or had been discovered but kept a secret by the newcomer…

Something about how he’d acted, how he’d spoken, had rubbed him in all the wrong ways… Mentally, at least.

The fox cop couldn’t help but listen in to what that paedofox had been saying. For some reason that he couldn’t quite put his finger on, it creeped him out especially, unnerving him down to his bones. How he structured his words. How he was so happy-go-lucky, sarcastic and deflecting in his put downs, and convincing in his begging while…

And then it hit him.

The fox was so like himself back when he was a hustler. He had all his old traits and mannerisms, boiled down and concentrated. He was like Nick, before he’d chosen to turn over a new leaf, but purified and distilled and evil, all plain and evident to see. Turning away and rubbing his eyes, a shiver went down his spine and he felt a hollow pit form in his stomach. Was that what he’d been like? Well, not the child rutting part obviously, but was that what others saw him as?

Was that what he was like to others? To Judy?

It was all wrong.

A taint, a miasma on him.

It was something that he suddenly realised he needed to move far away from. Run from… Salting the earth behind him and making sure he’d completely embrace his new life, changing everything about him on his path forwards. The alternative was letting him share that taint. He looked at Judy sadly. She didn’t deserve such a malaise, did she? Not in a friend… A partner… A…

_No_ , he told himself. She did care for him. She…

_But…_

_Yes…_

_No…_

His mind flicked this way and that in mental turmoil, worse than ever, before finally closing his eyes and taking a deep and calming breath. It helped to steady himself down a bit.

“You good Nick?”

He looked over and saw her paw on his. That _may_ have had something to do with it.

“Bit mixed up, muddled up,” he confessed. “But okay for now.”

_“Okay for now….”_

.

.

_Back in the present_

.

.

Dr Amy Lupuleli looked over at her patient. His paws up, they covered his face, slowly sliding down it as he groaned. “I’m guessing you’re not okay?”

“Astute observations like that are how I know you’re such a good doc, doc.”

She paused, a little grin growing on her muzzle. “Thanks for proving my point there, Mr Wilde,” she said, taking the time to make a few more notes. “Though I wouldn’t think into it all that much. You said you wanted to change everything about yourself, after seeing your own traits a very bad mammal. But him doing that doesn’t make it bad in you. We all act and talk in different ways. You grew up communicating and acting that way, you lived it for years. There’s nothing wrong with it, it’s who you are.”

She paused as she saw him bristle slightly.

This wouldn’t be as easy as giving him a little bit of reassurance, that was for sure…

“Not the right thing to say?” she asked.

“No…” he began, before pausing. There was a sigh, and she watched as he brought his paws up and rubbed them down his face again. “Doc. I… That whole kind of thing was me as a hustler, you know? A nasty fox who didn’t let people get close.”

She nodded her head.

“And I want to move past that. Past all of that, who I was and how I acted. That other fox showed me what kind of mammal I used to look like, didn’t he? Maybe not quite where I could have slipped down to, but not that far below. I don’t want to be that kind of fox! I became a cop and aimed to start a new phase in life, leaving the old behind, and… -I’ve been thinking about it.” There was a pause as he took in a deep breath and let it out, readying himself. “I feel that the things I want to leave behind includes how I behave to others. How I talk and treat others. A new me has to include how I speak and interact with everyone else, doesn’t it? It must include how I do those deflective jokes? I need to drag my entire personality into a new lane, and I’ve been trying to start to do it today. The thing is, and I know it’s early, but I just keep on slipping up.”

…

Dr Lupuleli look on curiously, her tail swishing back and forth a few times. This was all new, very new. Very worrying as well. Writing down and underlining _‘wants to give up sarcasm_ ’, ‘ _feels his old personality is tainted_ ’ and _'phobic like reaction',_ she opened her mouth to speak, only to be cut off.

“-I mean right back then, when you said, ‘ _I’m guessing you’re not okay’_ ,” he huffed, looking away. His ears were peeled back, and easily readable sign of shame. “I made a dumb joke when you got a bit too close to me, and it felt natural! There wasn’t this sense that I was stepping over a boundary, or that there was a warning light I ignored…. I just went and did it without thinking, and I keep doing that and can’t seem to stop.”

The binturong paused, looking down at her pad again, a concerned frown on her muzzle. “Do you truly think that your joking and such is a bad thing?” she asked. “Something you seriously need to move past to be a better mammal?”

“It’s all old Nick,” the fox said, shrugging. “And I don’t want to be old Nick, I want to be new Nick. I’ve become a cop, but I truly want to make up for my past. To be something good. To be something better.”

“Redemption?”

He looked over at her and shot a finger out. “Yes. That… -though I’m already red enough, so it’d just be -emption.” She rolled her eyes, managing a little chuckle. She paused though as she heard an irritated groan come from her patient. “-And… -There… -I… -Go…. -Again…” he grunted, gritting his teeth. “It... it just feels so good. So natural. Yet I can’t get rid of it.” He sighed, bringing his paws up to his eyes. “And who, especially her, would fall in love with someone who, deep down, was always like that.” He scolded himself, in an accusing tone. “Speaking like that. Acting like that… Just a stones throw or slippery slope away from a mammal like that fox. -Have I really even moved on at all? Probably not. Not enough to deserve her.”

He trailed off, and Dr Lupuleli nervously jotted down some more. “Mr Wilde,” she asked. “I felt comfortable around the old you. Doesn’t that reassurance make you feel comfortable with yourself?”

There was a brief snort. “If I did, I wouldn’t be here, would I?”

She paused, speechless for a second. “Well, I guess that’s a fair point,” she said. Her patient nodded back before wincing down, presumably as he realised he’d done it again. She was about to carry on, only for the beeping of her clock to cut through the air. She silently cursed it, knowing that she had some work to do and engagements to meet that wouldn’t let her carry on helping him. Still, she could try and prepare him for next time.

“I’ll be wanting to revisit this new issue when we next week,” she said, as her patient got up. “In the meantime, carry on with your old exercises, working on opening up a bit more.” Moving to the door, she let her tail grab the handle and open it, while keeping an eye on Wilde. “In terms of this new thing, I’d like you to not go too hard on this whole new personality thing just yet.”

“Uh… -doc?” he began. “I think I kind of have to.”

“I don’t. I’m pretty sure this is you being a bit too critical of yourself,” she reassured, smiling as she stepped forwards. “You’d just been through a stressful situation and had a knock on your confidence. I’m pretty sure this is actually just a big negative thought that has latched on and is trying to pull you down. Soon enough, if you remember your exercises, it’ll slip off your leg and stop dragging you into the deep.”

Nick looked at her morosely. “Doc… I thought of that, but I think this is different. It feels different.”

Dr Lupuleli nodded. “Well, my advice then is to keep an open mind. Don’t go beating yourself up if you can’t move on just yet. In fact, try and assess what other mammals think of your current personality. Finally, I think that the next session might be helped if officer Hopps is here to help out. Mind asking her?”

Nick nodded. “I will,” he said, reaching out a paw to shake hers. “And thanks. See you next time.”

“Next time,” she agreed, letting him close the door behind him.

…

There was a sigh and a groan as she returned to her desk. So much progress with that fox, and now what felt like a big step back. However, she could muse about it later. She had a few records to keep in line. Some notes to do. There was still that lingering worry for her patient though, lurking in the back of her mind, and she hoped he’d realise he was being a bit too harsh on himself there. His attempts to not become a deadpan snarker were something new, something that did concern her, and something that he’d hopefully realise was a bit unneeded without too much pushing.

Her thoughts were cut off suddenly, and her face grimaced, as she saw an application to section someone. “Never a good sign,” she said, as she opened it up. Lists of a few conditions, previous medical advice, as well as all sorts of crazy scrawling’s were listed out. Reading a testimonial from a family member, the binturong closed her eyes and grimaced. That was going to be a nasty call for sure.

.

**AN: And so it begins. As a bonus, enjoy this awesome commission by Jaff96.**

****


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I’d like to thank my new proofreader, DancouMaryuu, for reading through this chapter. By all means check out his own fic, Zeeplabor. It's got a good few unique OC's, is lighthearted, great fun, has giant robots battling each other and includes great appearances by members of the regular Zootopia cast to boot. I’d also like to thank all my new readers who are tagging along.
> 
> In addition, I’ve got an announcement to make. For those who don’t know, I’ve set up a separate one-shot collection for this fic, which will host all the non-canon one-shot ideas I come up with, etc. With so many different characters planned to arrive in this project, and with a tight and complex central plot, there’s all sorts of interactions that could happen but won’t fit in (and all sorts of silliness to boot too).
> 
> Now, bad news and good news for Aggretsuko fans. I’m taking my time to introduce the main players into this series. Acting out will be four chapters, about 25,000 words. Then there’ll be a oneshot to introduce a pair of very special secondary characters, before we get to another four chapter/ 25,000 word fic to catch up with the Fantastic Mr Fox crew. The bad news is that (though there’ll be cameos before) our favourite red panda arrives after all that. The good news is that the first one-shot is a Zootopia-Aggretsuko one.
> 
> Anyway, enough chat with me, back to the Zoot crew!

**.**

.

**Chapter 2:**

.

.

.

Nick tried to keep in mind all the things Dr Lupuleli had said the next day. After the success of the undercover mission a lot of paperwork needed to be filed, and that had easily carried on over from yesterday.

“To quote the immortal lines of Bun-Joey,” Nick noted, as he brought another stack over. “Oooh… -We’re halfway there!”

He looked over, spotting a little smile from Judy, just as she joined in. “Aaaahhhh Ah! Livin’ on a prayer!”

The red fox smiled, before sitting down, a new sheet coming out. “I now regret not having a fruitbowl here,” he joked. Happy jokes like this were still fine.

“Huh?”

“I could have upped my pun game by nibbling on a pear.”

He watched slyly as Judy giggled some more, before she returned to the long slog of forms that needed to be filled in. Witness reports, statuses, protocols… All that. If there was one thing the fox missed about his hustling business, it was the relative lack of form filling that was required. Bar the minimum level of legal due diligence, of course.

Pen on paper, he was about to write a description of the mysterious fox who’d stepped in during his undercover mission, given that his identity and location were completely unknown, when he remembered something. Something else from his hustling days, and one of the few things that he wished to keep hold of some more from back then. Out came his phone and, scrolling down, he pressed a number and called.

“WHO IZ IT!”

Nick flinched back, despite being prepared for that, before smoothly talking back. “Is that how you really greet Papa, Finny?”

“Nick…!? What you doing here callin’ me up at this hour?”

The red fox paused, checking the time and turning back. “Sorry. Forgot you take your afternoon nap in…”

“Cut to the biz already!? Or Scat!”

There was a sigh, before Nick carried on. “The little operation was a success, again...” There was a pause, and an enthusiastic smile. “The kits of Zootopia are safer than ever!”

“… Well, congrats I guess. You caught some child rutters. Big whoop!”

“And the civilian who provided my cover earned himself a nice little bit of money,” Nick carried on. “Though, if it were a civilian posing as the bait, they’d be open to much more… The offer is still open you know, if you want it.”

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line before Finnick’s voice burst out again. “Ah hell no! Just ‘cause you’re gettin’ tired of being the baby this time! It was your idea, you do it!”

Nick’s ears folded back a little. “I’m just looking out for a friend,” he grunted. “It’s honest work.”

“I’m doing good,” came the gruff reply. “So thanks but no thanks. I don’t care how many bucks you think you can payz me with! I’m a grown mammal, and I ain’t gonna make my living by letting you dress me up as a baby no-more!”

“Young child,” Nick pointed out, closing his eyes as his paw went down over his heart. “I’m a fox of my word, and my word was always that your work would be pawpers free. It was in the hustling days, remember?”

There was a pause, then a hearty chuckle. “Nick. I knowz you too well! You’d say that, then find a way to hustle ‘round it. So, I still say’z no! Got anything else to say?”

Nick sighed. “No.”

“Then _ciao_ , ex-partner!”

There was a click as the phone hung up, and Nick shook his head. “That’s what you get for trying to help an old friend,” he said. He couldn’t help but remember how evident his former partner made his lack of faith in him clear. It was a cold blow of reality through his heart, and it made him remember his therapist’s newest ‘homework’, trying to see what others thought of old Nick’s personality and all. Well, there was Old Nick for you, and, on top of that, ‘new’ Nick as it was turning out! He’d been teasing Finnick at the start of that call, hadn’t he? He’d just drifted naturally into it, without even realising.

He wanted to get away from that. He wanted to change, and when he was focussing he could stay those bad mannerisms before they came out. But doing that all the time? It was hard. So hard… Before he knew it, he’d be acting like Old Nick all over again. Suffice to say, his attempts at changing himself were not going well. “Am I really that untrustworthy?” he asked, unable to stop the faint image of the paedofox from lingering guiltily in his mind. He looked at his partner and hoped for a reassuring answer.

She just looked back, not answering.

His ears drooped a bit, and he spoke out, his voice still trying to be humorous but poisoned by a grave inflection. “Hmmm. That silence doesn’t bode well.”

“Just thinking,” the bunny replied. “Maybe he’d trust you more if you’d have chosen a better name for your plan.”

Nick retreated, acting in complete faux outrage. “I’ll have you know that operation Pacifierclip was a brilliant name. Right up there with all the others on the shortlist.” He brought out the fingers on his paw, before counting them off. “M, i-l, K ultra; Case Gooo; Operation Ba-ba’s-losta; the Tot offensive…”

He had to break off as Judy broke down giggling. He just stood there and watched her, captivated. She was crazy, happy, motivated and, as far as he could tell, perfect. Yet, for him at least, she was always too far out of his grasp. He looked away sighing, thinking about telling her his true feelings for her. That he loved her. That the world seemed more glorious when he could hear her voice and see her bright eyes. That she meant so much to him, bringing comfort and joy to him just from her memory alone…

But his throat began to hitch slightly, and he felt that mental muzzle clamp tight on his real one.

Despite the work he’d been doing with his therapist, despite the attempts made and major progress won in opening up about himself, he was still unable to get it out. That chance of her reacting poorly, or angrily, at his confession still rang through the back of his mind, ruling it out. In any case, hadn’t he just been all sarcastic, jokey and deflectiony _again_? After he’d just seen where that could boil down too? After seeing a pure concentrated example of the thing he’d told himself he needed to move away from. Had to, if he was going to clean his act up. He had, hadn’t he? Broken all the promises and slipped back to the very thing he was trying to get away from without a single thought.

He sucked, didn’t he?

Forget about Judy accepting him. There was no way he even deserved her.

…

“You okay, Nick?”

“Not really…”

“Thinking of doing another bit of homework?” she asked, and he looked over to see her smile slightly. He smiled a bit too. She wasn’t talking about his newest task from Dr Lupuleli, instead an older thing they’d been going through for quite some time now. It was a little exercise he’d been given in order to help him get used to opening up to different mammals and breaking his fear of rejection. Listing and ranking a number of different facts about himself in order of ‘off-putting-ness’, he’d been working up from the humdrum level ones towards the unspeakable level tens, recently reaching level seven.

There were only two level tens. The first was his previous little probing experiments and due diligence with Judy, which had confirmed that she was actually species unspecific when it came to romantic feelings. For instance, joking about a dapper wolf they’d met, who she’d said was handsome. Nick had led her on, and she’d said that she could see herself going out on a date with him, confirming that she had no problem with canids… Naturally, the only other level ten was that Nick secretly loved her. It was the one this whole exercise was building up to, so that he could finally reveal it.

“How about we try an Eight,” he said, his voice just a bit unsteady.

Judy nodded, even jumping up and down a little on her toes. It was cute. She was excited. “Hit me, Slick!”

“That mission was not my first time playing a character of a different age, you know…”

There was a pause as Judy’s ears rose, a curious look on her muzzle. “Interesting. Tell me more.”

“Well,” he began, breathing in and out as he did so. He’d got a good idea of a little story from his past, one that likely wouldn’t offend Judy too much, for a level eight that was. He was about to carry on when he felt a paw on his and froze, turning to face her.

She just smiled, giving him a knowing nod, and he carried on. “Given that I’m a bit of a local expert on Zootopia,” he began, smiling proudly a bit. “I had the idea of setting myself up as a kind of tour guide for those coming into the city. Particularly those whose grasp of the language, shall we say, wasn’t for the better.”

“Doesn’t seem so bad,” Judy replied. Nick looked at her nervously, before carrying on.

“I… _may_ have done some ‘self-marketing,’ in the form of presenting myself as someone who, stereotypically, might appear to have an even greater level of experience of the city than I would.”

She spoke softly. “You’re deflecting again.”

The fox sighed, bringing up a paw to scratch the back of his head. “I may have greyed my fur, dressed up as an old fox, and acted the part .”

Nick gulped, as a deadly serious expression grew across Judy’s face. “You’re going to drop that _and_ not give a demonstration.”

…

Relaxing again given her warm reaction, Nick, bowing, stood up and craned over her, wobbling like an old man before speaking out, his voice suddenly old and croaky and wavering. 

“WHEN I WAS JUST A KIT THIS HERE ALL USED TO BE LITTLE HOUSES! Houses you see, for the horses and the larger mammals, so I guess they were big houses. But little houses to the ‘Orses. They were needed in the docks and the industries you see. Great big lobby the old ‘Orses had, all the unions and so many politicians. They say Beaven created the welfare state on the common vote, but it was the ‘Orses you see. The ‘Orses and their unions, ‘cause the Orses were all on the left side. Bunch of commie sympathisers, you ask me! Pah! Bolshy scum! But the ‘orses and the zebra’s, -‘cause the Zebra’s were in this too mind you! Both have solid hooves and no fingers. Try balling your fists and eating and living and working like that! I had to do that as a kit you know, solidarity law! Every month you’d ‘ave your paws sealed in plaster, so you were in solidarity with the ‘Orses. That and walk to school for two hours a day, up one hill, then up another going back. They even turned the new climate system in tundra town on, all over the city, when we did that. So it was always a blizzard, every day! Builds character you see. No complaints to the receptionist when you got in late, or your spankings would be doubled!”

“-Anyway, after steam shovels and excavators, docking was the last big manual thing the ‘Orses could do. You could pay them less, as they were less dexterous you see, and then they would work your docks. Then they formed their unions and got earning more, can’t blame them I suppose. I used to sing the red flag with them mind you. Workers of the world unite! Really put the common mammal first! The working mammal’s life reached its peak in nineteen-forty-five and ever since the great Antlerlee was usurped in the nineteen-fifty by the elite, those monsters at the top have been warring on us, and I’m one of the good few commies left! The greedy fat cats, though very few are fat cats actually. Have to remember not to be speciesist anymore! Can’t have that, can you? Oh, this infernal political correctness! Damn it, we need a mammal in charge who says it like they mean it! 

“Hmmm… -Like that Dawn sheep, oh they slandered her name and framed her when she started doing the things those wishy-washy liberals hated. But I tell you what, her common sense was once common sense, and every joe in the pub would be happy to say it! ‘Cause it’s the truth you here. The same truth that let proud Zootopia win the war, all by herself, with four guns and an old biplane against the fascists! Grrr, I hate those monsters. My generation fought to get rid of them, and now they’re back. Pah! We’re wasted on you lot. ‘ _Oooooh whoooo -do you think, you are kidding mister Knitler, when you think old Zootopia’s done…! I am the fox who will stop your little game! I have a skulk who will make you think again!’_ Anyway, what with container ships, all the ‘Orses lost their jobs in the seventies, got dispersed out to the meadowlands where the land was cheaper and what not, and the whole place was knocked down and remodelled. Mainly to help with the shortages of homes for even bigger mammals… -Anyway, that’s that street, now over ‘ere… -and GET OFF MY LAWN! _”_

.

Whatever Nick was about to say trailed off as Judy, who’d been giggling and then laughing throughout all of it, finally keeled over. “ENOUGH!” she begged, still laughing. “Enough… Are you trying to kill me Nick? I…” Whatever she was about to say was cut off by a loud hiccup, which only made her giggle a bit more.

“Oh sweet mother Marian,” Nick commented, looking over. “Where do I press you to do a restart?”

Judy, wobbly on her feet, slowly got up, still hiccupping. “That’s amazing,” she giggled, shaking her head. “What’s embarrassing about that? As long as you told the truth and made them laugh a bit as much as I di… _-HIC_!”

“Well…” Nick said, looking up and running his fingers along the desk. “One of those times, I may have experimented on whether the gender of my OAM made much of a difference…. -And now I really need to find your restart button, Fluff.”

…

“Carrots?”

Finally stepping up again, Judy looked at him, still giggling slightly. “Nick… You were acting,” she said, smiling. “And sweet cheese and crackers, why hasn’t your acting made you famous? I mean - _hic_ \- you aced a little cub yesterday. There’s all the other - _hic_ -… times you acted out. You’re so good at it!”

The fox shrugged but couldn’t help but smile. “I guess, I mean getting into a role is as easy as slipping on a glove. I just live it. As for getting famous…” He paused, relaxing. This was a completely unembarrassing story, but one he hadn’t really had a chance to tell her yet. “I did actually look into that and did a few auditions for a laugh. Some agents even referred me on.”

Judy looked on, fascinating. “How far did that go?”

Nick shrugged. “I _may_ have once successfully auditioned for a role in a pilot TV show, about this son of a former billionaire trying to keep his crazy family together after his Pop’s illicit deals landed him in jail and his business is ruined… But even if the production company hadn’t folded and the pilot had aired, it probably wouldn’t have gone anywhere.” He paused, smiling, before looking up and sticking a lecturing finger up too. A universal sign for, ‘here’s an interesting fact worth contemplating’. “-In fact, it’s currently in an oddly ironic state given its proposed title.”

Judy nodded, before sitting down at her desk and carry on her work. “That’s a shame,” she said, looking up fondly. “You’re a good actor… I guess life forced you to be that to survive.”

“I guess so,” he added, returning to his.

“You acted in some way ever since you were eight, since the Junior Ranger Scouts…” she mused. “It would have been nice if that had worked out, and it gave you a good life. But then again, I guess you’d have never met me.”

“No,” Nick replied. He felt the same way but, as he turned back to his own work, his mind froze. The strange little squawk of the carrot pen rewinding played out in his mind, and Judy’s words began to repeat like a broken record; ‘ _But you acted ever since you were eight.’_

‘ _But you acted ever since you were eight.’_

‘ _But you acted ever since you were eight…’_

“Carrots…” he began to say, looking over. Suddenly a lot of things made sense. He was even feeling better about himself already. This explained everything! It wasn’t him! He wasn’t contaminated. His old Nick persona wasn’t himself, it was just an act he got lost in and he needed to learn to let go of. He could work out how to release himself from it, rather than focus on the little things, and kill the problem at its core. He wasn’t unsalvageable after all! His smile grew as he carried on speaking to the bunny. “You’re just….”

He was cut off as her radio squawked. She quickly pulled it up to her ear, nodded a few times, before speaking. “It was my partner. Call it off… Yes, I’m sure.”

Putting the radio down, her nose twitched a few times nervously. “That was from Trunkaby.”

“Right…”

“Warning us about an 11-73 she heard somewhere inside…”

Nick gulped, immediately adopting his ‘oh crap’ voice. “That’s our ‘crazy old person’ code… -right?”

The bunny nodded, as Nick’s palm had a sudden meeting with his face.

.

.

.

By the time he met up with his therapist again, Judy in tow, Nick was feeling a lot better. He happily explained his previous concerns to his work partner, even feeling a bit of a boost as Dr Lupuleli noted that he was opening up a lot by saying these things. He just replied that now he understood them, it was easy. Now that he understood that he’d acted this way as a defence since he was a kit and just got lost in it, and that it wasn’t who he really was, he felt so much better. He wasn’t tainted, he didn’t have that blackness at heart. He just needed to learn how to give up the act, and then just be…

He finished off smiling, only for that smile to fade as he saw the concerned look on a certain bunny’s face.

“Carrots?” he asked. “What’s wrong?”

There was a cold silence as she just sat there, a slightly confused and almost pitying look on her face.

“Carrots..?”

She stepped forwards, and to Nick's surprise she went straight for one of his paws, holding it tenderly. Her thumb ran along his knuckles, stroking them, before she looked up into his eyes. “I didn't know he knocked you that badly,” she said. “It explains why you've been acting strange this week.” There was a soft pause, before she carried on. “It's okay though, Nick. I see nothing of him in you.”

Nick's ears rose ever so slightly. “Really? Promise?”

She gave him a big grin. “Bunny Scout’s honour, I promise.”

Nick felt a surge of relief wash through him. “Good… Heh… -Important to know you still see me as top fox,” he said.

“Don't flatter yourself,” she joked back, pausing though as she heard the hollow laugh Nick gave in return. He was looking away slightly.

“I… Yeah, still a lot of work to do with this whole new me thing,” he noted seriously.

Judy blinked a few times, and looked at him, shaking her head slightly. “Nick,” she began, “You don't need to change the real you.”

“But it isn't the real me I'm talking about,” the fox replied. “It's this act I got lost in. It's about dumping that old hustler and going back to being that little ranger scout. You know, the one who peeks through sometimes that you like. The one that stood up for you. The one that didn't leave you at the museum…” He trailed off, looking at her as he took a steadying breath. “I've got to try,” he said, a little grin growing on his muzzle. “And I know someone here who made a very nice speech about trying.”

Judy glanced up at Dr Lupuleli, trying to gauge anything but seeing nothing of use, before returning to her fox. “If this is something you seriously feel you have to do,” she said, “I'll be there to help.”

“Thank you,” he said. “And I believe it really is,” he carried on, turning to the binturong beside them. “Don't you agree?”

“I'm here to help you on your own path,” she said. “I don't give you an endpoint, or give you a map, I…”

“It's going to be a no, doc, isn’t it?” Nick deadpanned.

Amy nodded. “It is, though I don't feel like I can convince you of that here and now,” she said. There was a pause as she thought, before she carried on speaking. “I can try and give you some tests that you could do. Exposing yourself, and either dispelling or confirming this thesis of yours. Does that sound reasonable?”

“I mean I guess,” Nick replied, before he shook his head. “But I feel so certain about this, so it'll probably be a waste of time. In any case, I'm trying to improve myself, aren't I? Bring the old me back. What's wrong with that?”

“You’re trying to change yourself,” the therapist pointed out. “Might as well confirm that a change is needed and will actually be good.”

Nick looked at her, his tail giving a few casual swishes, before he gave a defeated shrug and spoke. “I don’t feel like I can convince you of this here and now,” he said, smirking slightly. “But I'll do these things, whatever they are, to keep you happy.”

“Thank you,” she said, an ever so slight look of relief washing over her face. “As for what you'll be doing… -You brought up the idea of acting a lot. Have any of you done any amateur acting?”

Nick chuckled, waving a dismissive pawn “Please, _professional_ abandoned TV pilot veteran in the room.”

“University theatre club musical actress in the room,” Judy chirped up too, her paw springing up.

Nick’s eyes widened, and he leant forwards, curious. “I didn’t know you were in a musical.”

She chuckled back, shaking her head. “Ever since I was a little kit, I loved acting. It was my backup career for the police force for most of my life! In fact, I first became interested in both things for the same reason.”

“Now this I've got to hear,” Nick said. “I mean, I always thought that you became a cop after seeing some terrible injustice that needed fixing! Or that someone was in peril and you saved them…” He closed his eyes, drumming his fingers along his muzzle as he thought. “Or maybe some embarrassing failure at basic Bunny 101 or something; a flop so bad it made you want to try your hardest at something completely different, or it was such a worry for you that you ran away, only to be returned by an inspiring officer of the law. Screwing up at a harvest, or being worse than useless with young kits, either way getting very messy and shell shocked and…”

“Nick, not everyone has a tragic backstory,” Judy pointed out, matter-of-factly. Pointing a finger at herself, she boasted out proudly. “In my case, I was inspired by officers Humps and Spitz, from TV’s fuzzy justice!”

Nick paused for a moment.

“Can we swap backstories?” he asked at last. “I didn't know cute and happy and being too young to get the 'that makes my hump rock hard’ joke was an option.”

“...Aaaaannnnnd... that’s my childhood ruined,” Judy said, ever chippy. “Thanks Nick!”

“My pleasure,” he said, taking a bow.

Judy looked on for a few seconds, before pushing forwards. “Anyway, I did drama all through my school years, and at university. I was actually good friends with the head of Bunnyburrow States’s drama society and played a starring role in our _Pirates of Pawzance_ performance.”

Nick froze, his mouth hanging open. “Sweet mother Marian,” he gasped.

“What?”

“Judy-Hopps-doing-modern-major-general! Judy-Hopps-doing-modern-major-general! Judy-Hopps-Doing-Modern-Major-General!!!!!!!”

She burst out laughing. “Almost, but not quite.” She stood up, clearing her throat, before pausing to think and remember. Finally, dropping her voice an octave or two for good measure, she began singing: 

_“_ When a felon's not engaged in his employment! _his employment._

Or maturing his felonious little plans _, little plans._

His capacity for innocent enjoyment _, -cent employment._

_Is just as great as any honest Mam's, honest Mam's”_

_..._

“My life is now complete,” Nick stated solemly. “There is nothing left for me, for I hath seen Judy Hopps singing the third most known song from the world's favourite satiric pirate opera… -and is it me, or do you smell popcorn?”

“That's your therapist,” Judy deadpanned, “binturongs smell like that.’

“No…” Nick said, trailing off as he took a few additional sniffs. “I think I smell actual popcorn.”

_Crunch..._

Both Nick and Judy turned to face Dr Lupleli. There was a brief pause, before she pulled up an opened packet of popcorn and swallowed. “Want any?”

They both shrugged and took a pawfull. “That was all interesting,” she stated as they ate. “Officer Hopps, did you ever find any actors who got lost in their roles?”

She thought for a moment or two. “Well, there was the leader of the theatre club who… -let’s just say he got very involved with his roles.”

“Is he nearby? Still acting?”

Judy's eyes widened. “He actually works at a theatre in the city!” She said, turning to Nick. “We could visit him.”

“Sure,” Nick said with a shrug. “It could be fun.”

Dr Lupleli nodded, before grabbing a bit of paper. She wrote something down on it, before looking up to Nick. “Could you let Judy and I talk for a second. In private?”

Nick nodded and left the room. They weren't in there for long, and he was very curious, something turned right to up eleven when Judy came out. “I am bound by silence,” she announced, handing him a letter. He glanced at it, spotting ‘ _open in case of existential crisis’_ written on the front.

“Very reassuring,” he noted, slipping the letter into a pocket and then scolding himself a little for his old-Nick-ness. “Now what?”

“Now,” Judy said, beginning to hop up and down with excitement. “I'm going to take you to meet Jack Savage!”


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Okay, important talk to start with. Let’s get this over with. Reptiles, birds and primates…**

**Non-sentient in Zootopia. Not sentient (and in one case regularly hunted) in Fantastic Mr Fox. But sentient in Aggretsuko and so many more, with amphibians joining in on occasion to make things more annoying.**

**Now, I could revert to the highest standards, and have non-sentient birds, reptiles and apes… But that means dropping frickin’ Washimi and Gori. Worse, in series 2, two incredibly important characters are planned to come in who are not mammals.**

**So, just have all those guys as sentient too, right?**

**Well, in ‘Different’ I utterly wrote myself into a corner there, given the importance of hunting and raising birds to the fox family.**

**Now, originally I planned to get around it all with what I called the Schrödinger solution. In essence, the sentience varied depending on which IP you were viewing from. In short, Retsuko could introduce Judy to a talking Washimi in one of her fics, and in the next Nick would take her to a zoo and they’d see a falconer working with a secretary bird. I also called this the ‘Allo-Allo’ method, based around a popular british sitcom about french resistance fighters. In it, the characters (speaking in english) were canonically speaking in french. However this presented a problem in regards to the two RAF airmen who they had to perpetually try and smuggle home, and who canonically couldn’t speak a word of french. The solution was the main cast doing their usual french-english in a slight french accent, the airmen speaking english-english in very large ham upper class toff accents, and thus neither side understanding each other without a translator. The hilarity was doubled with the character Officer Crabtree, a british secret agent posing as a gendarme, who could speak ‘french’ but very poorly (his famous catchphrase being ‘Good Moaning’).**

**Anyway, this solution sounded great on paper, and I was going to have a ton of fun with it… But then the doubts began coming in. It was complex, hard to explain, etc… In the end, I decided to adopt a different solution, which I call the ‘Amended Fox Point’ model.**

**Now, Fox Point was a fantastic Zootopia-Sly crossover, and in its lore there were sentient mammals as well as non-sentient ones (with Dawn at one pointing ending up in a pile of non-sentient cows dung). It was a bit odd at first, but I felt that once used to it you could roll with it, and there being sentients and non-sentients is a good solution to the issue with the Fantastic Mr Fox lore.**

**So, in this AU series, the background is this:**

**1: In the past, an event caused some members of all species (Mammal, reptile, bird, amphibian) to gain sentience, though the rest remained as they were, in effect creating two different species out of each one that was pre-existing.**

**2: With mammals, the sentient ones soon wiped out the non-sentient ones, them being competition. Very few non-sentient mammals survive to this day, with mammals being the majority of sentient lifeforms on the planet.**

**3: Reptiles were more a mixed bag. Sentient snakes, having no means to use their intelligence, died out while non-sentients survived. There are also some species, where the original was already excellently adapted, where both varieties survived. You can get sentient and non-sentient crocodiles for instance. However, due to their cold blood, sentient reptiles were at a disadvantage to mammals. In hotter climates sentient ones are not too uncommon but globally I’d say mammals make up 85% of sentients, reptiles 10%.**

**4: With birds (who evolved grasping feathers as digits), sentience rarely gave many benefits. Sentient birds still exist, making up just shy of 5% of sentients, but most are non-sentient. Birds are the most common form of non-fish wildlife in this story by far, while chickens and ratites (ostriches, emus, etc.) are commonly farmed (sentient examples of each do exist, and are okay with it). Arguably, the most successful bird cultures would be those established on remote islands and such. Native new-zealand birds (Kiwis, Keas, Moas etc.) might take up a role in their country similar to the Maori, while I can imagine the pacific island peoples being birds (There could potentially be an antarctic republic led be penguins too, idk.)**

**5: The tiny sliver left could be the few amphibians that made it, such as the axolotl that works with Retsuko.**

**6: Zootopia, being a fairly recent (last few centuries) city, was settled by pioneers, in particular mammal pioneers. Many places have variances in the numbers that settle there, and while it got an average pred-prey ratio, very few primates were involved or interested in moving to that region. For a long time it was too north for reptiles to be interested too (though I can see more moving to Sahara square).**

**7: People say mammals a lot as 99-98% of the time they’re right (and also lazy). Ditto for referring to non-sentient birds as birds (Sentient ones often have the prefix added to distinguish them). Non-mammal species in the developed world and most of the developing do have equal rights and such.**

**Anyway, all caught up? Good! Right, onwards.**

**.**

**Sidenote: I’m publishing today as I’ve got lots of stuff to do, and I want to clear my schedule for tomorrow given that a minecraft server I play on updated recently. It got me thinking about update dates. Tuesdays work for me, but would you guys prefer different dates? If so, just say.**

**Anyway, onwards! (For real this time)**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 3:**

.

Walking out of the subway station, Judy followed the directions on her phone’s Zoogle Maps app, leading Nick towards the main Sahara square theatre district. They strolled along the wide sweeping plaza that surrounded the palm hotel, water fountains dancing in the pool at its base, all while passing line after line of big-name venues. Taking a sidestreet, they turned into the older parts of the district, the streets narrower and taller, with smaller side theatres sprouting out here and there. The fox, following on, smiled as they passed them, flicking the aviators off his head and slipping them into his trouser pocket. “The art house district...” he began, Judy getting a pre-emptive grin on her muzzle. “This can…”

There was a pause, Nick mentally stopping himself, a little smile and nod of success flashing on his muzzle as he did so. “This might be interesting, let’s see what he’s like.”

“Yes,” she replied, her ears drooping back a bit. Turning a corner, she carried on with renewed vigour, the fox behind her curious as they seemed to leave the trendy part of the district. He even had to get his specs out again, slipping them on, as they emerged onto a bright four-lane street that marked the edge of the traditional arts area. On a roll, he held back the urge to make a witty remark, even if ones about both the area they were in and the sense of direction in bunnies sprung into and out of his head.

He grumbled.

This sucked.

Still, this was something that he had to do he reminded himself. Keep cutting off the little things until he learned how to give up this act entirely, and the world would see a good fox return.

A brand new Nick! (Enjoy that new Nick smell while it lasts!)

“Here we are Slick!”

Looking up, Nick took in the sight before him with intrigue. They were on a generic major road, with generic palm trees lining it and generic modern stucco and glass buildings running along it. Yet, right between an unassuming orange and glass store and a banal looking glass office building, was a tall, thin and ornate theatre. The entire architecture of the place seemed off, looking like something more in place in Tundratown or the Vatican than tucked away in Sahara Square. Built out of some bright white stone of some kind, it had two round columns rising up either side of the entrance canopy, going all the way to the roof. In the centre of the facade were some gold decorations, flanked by a tall and narrow window either side, and topped by what almost seemed like a bird bath. It was at the top of the building, however, that the theatre really became out of place. The entire facade was crowned with a whole set of ornate baroque detailings, complete with statues of lyres and all sorts. All in all, it was a very pretty building, but as a born-and-bred Zootopian, Nick couldn’t help but feel that it was completely out of place in this part of town.

“Anything going on up in there, Nick?”

“Just wondering if I should have been an architecture critic,” he mused, before pausing… “Nah, that one was fine.”

He and Judy both smiled as they walked in. Climbing up the steps, under the awnings (the billboard on it stating that it was closed for practice), the bunny paused as she saw the sorry state that some of the stone and plasterwork was in.

“Just a sign of character,” Nick said genuinely with a smile. Judy looked back, only for her ears to rise and turn, hearing someone coming out. There was a rattle as the doors opened and a tall, thin sheep stepped out. He wore a pair of orange swimming trunks, a green undershirt, and a gaudy yellow suit with just the one button done up, alongside a pink carnation on one of the lapels.

Judy couldn’t help but cringe. The sheep’s ensemble made the worst tie/pawaian shirt combo that Nick could pull off look…

Semi-mediocre.

Whoever he was, he looked down at the scrappy bits of plaster and the odd crack that was present and shook his head. “This whole place is going to fall down and kill us all. Buster doesn’t seem to get that.”

“O-kay,” Judy said, pausing as she looked up to him a paw out. “Nice to meet you, Mr...”

“Eddie,” he said, smiling.

“Nick,” the fox added. “You own this place?”

“No, my friend Buster does,” he replied, before leaving and walking off. Nick watched him walk down the steps, before meeting two new mammals in black suits: a tall and regal, if not vain looking, tiger, and a dark orange lion with a black main, a slight scar on one of his eyes. The sheep looked back up at the bunny and fox and just waved at them. “Go in if you want. I know you two from TV, you’ll probably find some horrible conspiracy in there or something. Just need to talk to these two about business.”

“Thanks,” she said, a paw half rising in the air before she dropped it down. Looking back, she saw Nick open the door for her and walked in, the fox following. She waited there, ears rising, only for an odd look to grow on her face as nothing came. Judy scowled, deciding then and there that if Nick wasn’t going to make any corny jokes or witty banter, then she’d do it herself. “Getting betrayed by evil sheep may be our kind of thing,” she said, before pointing behind her. “But I don’t think we need to worry about him pulling the wool over our eyes.”

A little grin flickered on Nick’s muzzle and he looked down. “Hustler Nick would certainly agree that he’s a bit woolly headed.”

She smiled and relaxed somewhat as her partner cracked the ice as usual. She’d been beginning to miss that. “Jack’s the head of writing and production here,” she said as she looked around. “Let’s try and find our way to the…” She trailed off, about to say stage, but then seeing something. Nick chuckled as he saw it too, was quiet for a few seconds as he thought, before giving a shrug.

“If there’s a critical mass of weirdness, fluff, I think that’s dangerously close… -and that was all fine as it was an honest observation, just so you know.”

She nodded in agreement. Next to the waiting area, all lined out, was a collection of weird stuff. Jars and bottles almost but not quite entirely recognisable things, strange clocks and the odd totem pole, just to start with. Nick and Judy walked in front of one of them, a large, gilded sarcophagus, and just took it in. Its head area was shaped like a sinister-looking owl’s head with rubies for eyes, while painted wings went down either side like arms, strips reaching inwards like feathers. It was all done in a dark, cold, lead-like metal, albeit with a coppery sheen.

“Okay…” Judy said, giving the sarcophagus a thumbs up and walking to the next exhibit. Nick followed, only for his head to dive down, a paw going up to cover it in shame.

“I don’t know what this is, but it makes me feel bad.”

“I agree with you both times,” she replied, turning away from the two yellow plastic pill creatures, one with two eyes in goggles, one with just the one without, and both wearing blue dungarees with a stylized G on it.

“Do you think this pair is why the theatre is failing?” Nick asked. “As I think it’s why the theatre is failing.”

“To be fair,” Judy pointed out. “Just because it’s in a bad shape, doesn’t mean it’s…”

“-And this is the statue here that we’ll be selling, to pay our bills and stop our theatre going bust,” the sheep from earlier said, walking in with the tiger and lion. The former looked on and shook his head, tutting with contempt before having a last pull on the cigarette in his mouth, Nick holding out his paw to stay a righteously disapproving Judy as he did so. He then pointed at the yellow…  _ things _ and spoke in a proud voice. 

“You know, I would never lower myself to buy anything as insultingly bad as that.” 

The lion next to him groaned mirthfully, before speaking.

“Well, it's a good thing that were after  _ that,”  _ he said forcefully, pointing at the sarcophagus. His voice was also proud, but also condescending, and quite loud too.

“Ohhhhh…. Relax,” the tiger said, smiling. “I know that.” He looked down towards the sheep and smiled. “Where do we exchange currency, dear fellow?”

“Just hold on for the boss,” he said, before the door behind him opened, a koala bear stepping out. “ _ That’s _ the boss.”

“It is!” the Koala said cheerfully, walking forwards with his arm outstretched. “Buster Moon, owner of Moon’s Theatre, welcome, welcome…”

“Pleasure meeting you,” the tiger said, shaking the small marsupial’s paw. The lion behind him just nodded.

“Indeed, indeed,” the koala said, smiling happily. “Here to place your bid in the auction, I see.” He paused, turning to look at the bunny and fox duo. “What about you two? Pleasure to meet you. Buster Moon.”

“Judy Hopps.”

“Nick Wilde.”

“Great, great,” he replied, before pausing. “Oh, before I forget, may I introduce my secretary, Miss Crawley.” He gestured behind him, only to pause as he saw no one there. “She’s probably lost her glass eye again. They never really mastered them for iguanas, hers keeps popping out.”

Judy blinked a few times. It was often that you got to deal with sentient reptiles. Buster just smiled though and carried on, chipper as ever. “She’ll be managing the bank transfers and such,” he said, before turning to Eddie. “See! I told you this little auction of the old knick-knacks would save the theatre. We’ve already got a bidding war!”

“Actually,” Judy replied, “I’m here to see my old friend. Jack Savage.”

“Ah, Jack!” Moon said, before trailing off, a concerned look on his face. “He’s backstage. Can’t miss him. Old friend, you say?”

“Yup.”

“Good,” he noted. “I can’t help but feel he’s really down for some reason. And, every time I try and cheer him up, he just seems to get worse. Still, a little help from friends and all.”

Judy’s ears drooped down from the news and she nodded. “I’ll go in. It doesn’t sound like him, unless he’s playing a tragic role, but yeah. Time with old friends may be just what the doctor ordered.”

“That’s the spirit,” he said before waving them off. Judy nodded and began leaving, though Nick paused.

“Could I put a bid of one cent on the Spongebob-vitamin pill hybrids?” he asked.

“Sure! Why not!” Buster chriped, quickly bringing out a clipboard which Nick signed. The fox jogged back to an aghast Judy, his paw held up to stop her. They turned and walked away, the red furred mammal shrugging. “I think this whole place is a bit weird.”

“Yeah,” she said, her voice hardening. “Almost as weird as your bidding on those abomination things.”

He rolled his eyes. “Relax, I intend to do my part in keeping this place open… by wiping those things from the face of the earth.”

Judy smiled. “Good to see the old Nick back,” she said, as they walked towards the backstage.

“New Nick, or rather original Nick,” he corrected. “Brutal honesty is still okay, thank merciful god!”

Back at the gathering, the four mammals watched on as the bunny and fox turned a corner, before the sound of a new door opening rang out. They all turned and saw an elderly iguana in a sunflower dress walk out, waving at them. “Sorry I’m late!”

.

* * *

.

The whole theatre was strangely empty, an uneasy feeling rubbing out of the walls and onto the two mammals. Moving through the unfilled regiments of seats, must and dust wafting up in the air, Judy couldn’t help but expect a snarky comment from her partner.

Even glancing behind her to confirm he was still there, the lack of one still set her on edge. Up to the front of the stage, the pair climbed on, taking in the giant moveable set piece that lay in the centre. “Any… observations?” Judy asked, smiling hopefully as she looked over to a curious Nick.

“I see bits of wagon trains and a saloon there,” he said, pointing the foldable parts out. “And a fake bit of mesa too.” He looked down and smiled. “I’m guessing your friend is doing a western.”

She looked down, her nose twitching a few times from irritation. The irony that it was due to Nick  _ not _ being irritating most certainly wasn’t lost on her. “I was thinking comic observations.”

Nick looked down at her, his eyes half lidding in annoyance. He shook his head though, before shrugging and pointing at a pair of gallows, folded away until their time came. “I guess some poor schmuck will be  _ hanging _ around there.”

“Thank you,” she said, relaxing a bit. She was still slightly annoyed by his lack of annoyance, but she flashed him a smile to tell him that she’d liked that. It grew as he smiled a bit too.

“And there’s that bunny who’s always asked me to take things a little more seriously.”

“The important word is, ‘a little,” Judy clarified. She was about to carry on, only to pause as she heard something above her. Both she and Nick turned, looking up to the top of the set piece, as a figure emerged and promptly leapt down in front of them. He stood above the pair, dressed in period piece wilderness gear, a bandana and headscarf completely obscuring his face. There was a powerful sense of gravitas in his body. Judy moved forwards to speak, only to be silenced by an outstretched gloved palm, ordering her to stay and be silent. He or she stood over them, seeming taller and larger than both despite being in the middle of their size range.

The figure put its gloved paws together, purposefully removing one and then the other. Then it undid the lower face mask, revealing a chiselled, inexpressive face. Its fur was grey-furred with hints of stripes peeking in. Both paws came up, and the newcomer cast off their hat and the remaining part of the mask attached to it. They swept off the top of his head and back, and he revealed himself in full form.

It was a jackrabbit, but what type Nick couldn’t make out, mainly because he was so unique. Black straps pulled back on his grey face, some going up his ears. His eyes were brown, with a terrible sense of weight behind them. A spark of intellect? A hint of cunning?

“Jack!” Judy said happily.

He appraised both of them, before glancing at Nick. “I don’t know you...” he said, before moving over to the doe. There was a gravitas in his voice, though oddly, as he spoke, Nick was sure he could hear a hint of a Hispatic accent. “But you, I never forget a face. Judy Hopps.”

Nick snorted, chuckling a bit, while Jack smiled, coming forward to give the bunny a hug, which she promptly returned. They broke apart and he spoke again, Nick confirming to himself that there was indeed a slight Mexicat inflection that crept into his speech. “I’ve always wanted to do that,” he said, his voice suddenly a lazy and relaxed drawl. “Nice to meet you Judy. I kind of know what you’ve been up to,” he said, smiling as he did so before looking over at Nick. “Ditto.”

“As you do.”

“As I do,” he said with a little flourish, relaxing back down and leaning back onto his set. “But what  _ do  _ you do? Here. Now… With your friend.” He pointed over to Nick, or at least in the fox’s general direction.

“He’s my partner on the force, Nick Wilde…”

“Heard how you took down Bellwether,” he said, giving a big thumbs up with one paw.

“Well yeah,” Nick said, smiling a little. “I…”

“Hang on,” he interrupted, his eyes suddenly going wide and his ears shooting up. No longer slouching, he stood up, marching towards Nick with a purpose. “You have to show me! Give me a demonstration!” he said, excitedly. He paused, turning to Judy, one of his feet suddenly drumming on the floor. “You too Judy!” He looked at both of them, like a kit in a candy store. “The greatest, most important, bit of acting Zootopia has ever seen! Both the heroes here…” He smiled, looking smug for himself. “-And playing an evil sheep has to be fun too… Hmmm… I could go cackling evil? Menacing? Misguided? I mean, what was she like? Did she have a tragic backstory? A tragic backstory for her might be interesting…”

He trailed off in thought, before shaking his head to clear it. Focussing back on Judy, he marched forwards, pulling her into another hug, his paw patting her hard on the back. He couldn’t help but chuckle. “This! Is! Brilliant!” Letting her go, he smiled, giving a quick wink. “Look where you went and landed yourself!” There was a smirk, and another wink. “Here’s looking at you, Kit.”

…

“My partner would usually joke about this in some way at this point,” Judy said, glancing over at Nick, who just shrugged innocently. “He’s been going through some stuff recently. But he’s acted beforet.”

“Old TV pilot,” Nick noted. He looked forwards at Jack solemnly before carrying on. “I did enjoy doing it, and it might have gone somewhere… I was an off-the-street cast though, so when it fell through so did any fledgling acting career.”

The hare looked at him and sighed. “Shame…” he mused, before shifting with a slight realisation. “-or actually not! Anyway, you here to answer the call? Now that evil sheep removal is out of the way? Or tips on undercover work? That would be a good reason to come here… Or…”

“-I think I’ve found my call in the force,” Nick interrupted, smiling. “Thank you. And I’m already more than a little versed in undercover work.”

“You sure? Hey diddle-diddle, actors…”

“Lay off him Jack,” Judy said, smiling. “Just here to catch up with some old friends.” She looked at him and smirked. “Maybe subject him to enough corny acting to jumpstart his usual teasing.”

Jack bristled up a bit, looking over at Judy, a stern look on his face. “I’m not corny, Judy,” he noted firmly, before he raised a lecturing finger. “Except when I want to be!”

Judy rolled her eyes, and Nick couldn’t help but spot the slight flicker of a smile on the hare’s muzzle. Giggling slightly, the doe looked over at the fox, and then back at Jack. “Anyway, I’ll need to talk to you in private, but Nick’s therapist encouraged this meet up. Just here to have a bit of fun!”

Jack looked at both of them and then smiled. “Fun’s good,” he said, relaxing.

There was an awkward pause between them, Nick and Judy looking at each other slightly.

It ended though as Jack blinked a few times, snapping back to reality. “Oh, right… You probably want to go to my office then.”

“Office sounds good,” Judy replied, tagging along.

Nick followed after, the fox deep in thought. “Say Jack, you know the Pirates of Pawzance?”

One of the hare’s eyebrows lifted ever so slightly.

.

.

.

**(A few seconds later)**

.

“I am the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia,

I’ve performed satirical, classical and opera,

I know the plays of Sheepshear, and I quote the pentameters iambical!

From comedy of errors to Henry the eight that’s all…

-I’m very well acquainted too with matters police procedural,

I hear the news, both humdrum and dramatical,

About the city saving duo with a big old bone to chew…”

…

Jack paused, paw to his chin, thinking. “Hmmm... Bone to chew… Bone to chew?”

…

“GOT IT!”

“-Against many naughty crimmies who have yet to go and pay their dues!”

Before his mouth had even finished closing, Nick jumped right in. “ _ Against many naughty crimmies who have yet to go and pay their dues! -Against many naughty crimmies who have yet to go and pay their dues! -Against many naughty crimmies who have yet to go and pay their dues!” _

.

“I’m very good at ad-lib and improvisional silliness,

I know the tickliest puns of every single mammalius,

In short, in humour satirical, classical and opera,

I am the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia!”

_ “In short, in humour satirical, classical and opera, he is the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia!” _

.

“I know our artistic history, from cavemam to the multiplex,

I write tough drama, and like a bit of offscreen implied sex,

I quote romantic passion, to a cardboard cut-out T-rex,

In comics I can adapt even all the lowest bets…

-I can transform hard satires to melodramatic travesties,

And know the booing chorus is just some nonsense mutterings,

Then I’ll train a choir into silent dancers who are all out tip top …”

…

“Hmmm… tip top… tip top… I.. -AHHH!!!! GOT IT!

-And tap dance act out all that infernal nonsense ZTOP!”

_ “-And tap dance act out all that infernal nonsense ZTOP! -And tap dance act out all that infernal nonsense ZTOP! -And tap dance act out all that infernal nonsense ZTOP!” _

.

“I can’t be asked to write a washing bill out with my paw,

But I’ll make that joke somehow, I’m really not a bore.

In short, in humour satirical, classical and opera,

I am the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia!”

_ “In short, in humour satirical, classical and opera, he is the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia!” _

…

“In fact!” he continued, the song taking a much slower pace. “-When I know what is meant… by ‘enter on…’ and ‘-parry him…’

When I can tell at site an untalented trifle…. from a ‘ _ charlatin _ ’…

When such affairs as rewrites… and edits… I’m more caring at…

And when I know what is meant by: ‘why not soften that?’

When I know why my idiot boss likes everything so sunny!

When I don’t get annoyed at mammals saying I’m just a bunny!

In short, when I have the respect to doff my hat at thee….”

….

“Nope, that’s a sticky one… BACK TO THE ORIGINAL!”

“-You’ll say a better acting hare has never  _ sat _ a gee!”

_ “-You’ll say a better acting hare has never sat a gee! -You’ll say a better acting hare has never sat a gee! -You’ll say a better acting hare has never sat a gee!” _

“For my acting career, though stunning and worthy of flattery,

Has been humbled so far by meddlers oh so irritably,

But still in humour satirical, classical and opera,

I am the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia!”

_ “But in humour satirical, classical and opera, he is the very model of an acting hare from Zootopia!”  _ Nick carried on singing out the tune while Jack, marching a silly sped up march around both him and Judy, gave a quick bow before zipping off to his office, closing the door behind him in a triumphant finale.

The fox let out a long and excited clap, Judy joining in. She looked up to him and smiled. “Happy now?”

He looked down at her. “Am I happy? Yes, yes I am.” Judy smiled at the return of one of his biggest verbal mannerisms, only to pause as he cleared his throat. “That’s ones still okay in new Nick.”

Looking up at him, she shook her head slightly before pausing, glancing back at the door.

…

“Can we come in Jack?”

“Oh, right. Of course.”

The bunny-fox duo outside looked at each other and nodded, before opening the door. Before they even stepped in though, their eyes widened with shock. “I thought it was just a student thing,” Judy noted quietly. “But I think it’s got worse.”

Jack looked back at them and shrugged. “Problem?”

Nick and Judy just looked around at his office. It was an absolute tip. Not the kerfuffly chaos of the Hopps household in Bunnyburrow, or the odd bits lying on the odd desk of Nick’s place, but a full on trash heap. Papers were scattered everywhere, even across the floor, along with old takeout dishes, bits of mouldy food still in a good few. The hare must have hopped and leaped over his trash strewn floor to get to his seat, which he was now leaning back into.

“Problem?”

Nick, voice going nasal as he covered his nose with his hands, replied. “No, not at all.”

Jack looked at Nick, suddenly curious. “Oooh, what’s this then?”

“It’s him protecting his sensitive fox nose, Jack,” she said. The hare paused, blinking a few times as he pondered to himself, before groaning.

“What!?” he said, a hint of defensiveness seeping into his voice. “It’s fine,” he dismissed, his fur ruffling up a bit. “Anyway, I’m too busy to spend time and effort cleaning something that’ll just get dirty again.”

“You can hire people to do that for you, you know?” Judy offered.

“Cleaners? Well, I keep meaning to, but…” he explained away, pausing to think. “Is there anything else you’d like to talk about? Given that you’re not here to get back into acting -which is still an option for you by the way!”

“We’re good,” Nick said, smiling even as he covered his nose. A smile that faded as he sniffed a few times and walked over to a plastic cup half filled with a long flat cola, a small mat of mould floating on top. He backed away, just as Judy started talking.

“It’s true,” she said, before she took on a slightly sassy look. “Besides, it wouldn’t be comfortable for us without the payments you get from the Z-D-E-S-P…”

“I can get on just fine without those,” Jack said, brushing her off as he waved his paw out a bit. His nose was twitching slightly, something Nick saw as he glanced over, the fox’s ears rising up. After all, it wasn’t often that you encountered a mammal who dealt with the Zootopia Department of Endangered Species Protection.

“I could have figured that you were a rarer type of hare,” Nick said, “but I didn’t think you were rare enough to get E-S-P payments. What species are you exactly?”

Jack gave a little shrug, looking away as he said it. “Tehuantehec Jackrabbit, though one with an unusual colour pattern,” he explained. “I get even more stripes than usual, and I’m grey. -And I’m legally a Tehuantehec Jackrabbit! -Not 300 club, but not far off, so I do get a benefit payment and some dumb magazine or something every month from the gov. Don’t really pay it much attention though.”

“Interesting,” Nick said with a shrug. Judy looked up at him, before looking forwards towards Jack.

“Anyway, we’re here to ask you for your help,” she said, pausing as she saw his ears droop down and his body slump slightly. “Help that involves acting.” The ears perked up again, and he sat up to look at them.

“Sounds fun,” he said, leaning forwards. “Is this an undercover mission or something?”

Nick looked from Jack and Judy and Judy and Jack, before shaking his head, an action unnoticed by Judy even as she glanced up at him. “Mind stepping out for a bit, Nick?”

He nodded, before leaving the room and closing the door, immediately unplugging his nose and taking a few deep breaths of air the second it was closed. Wafting the air in front of him, he glanced back and shook his head. “Five minutes, then it’s gas mask on and rescue time.”

.

* * *

. 

They were out in less than that, Judy hopping off over to the costume department and Jack walking over to Nick. “She says you think that you’re lost in an act, and that you want to learn to get out of it. Right?”

“Yeah,” Nick said. “It’s a bit complicated, but…”

“-So we’ll leave it at that, and just get you fixed. Okay! Step one: get into a role. Any role. Maybe a pirate role, I don’t know. You’d look good in that. Or a sales mammal role! Even better…”

Nick paused, thinking, before he smiled. “How about crazy old guy giving a tour?”

Jack smiled. “Show me what you got.”

.

.

Judy heard it from miles away but, after gathering all her stuff, she couldn’t help but sit back and watch as the chaos unfolded in front of her.

“-Anyway, that’s that street, now over ‘ere… -and GET OFF MY LAWN!”

“Tis your lawn?” Jack asked, in an exaggerated east asian accent. “So sowwy! May I take picture of lawn?”

“No you may not!” Nick scoffed, still doing his crazy old mammal voice, albeit raising a paw into the air as if he were waving a cane. “I know them camera’s and I know the flashes have all those chemicals in! You’ll give my lawn chemical burns! Chemical burns! I go on my paws and knees to manicure this lawn, you hear? Every day, six in the morning till eleven at night, with a toothbrush and some tweezers, going over each little itty bitty blade of grass and getting the bugs off! You know how nice those bugs are? Those are my bugs, you hear? And I’m not gonna let you kill my bugs with your darn new-fangled chemical flash, all going poof into the air, as if you own the place and have the right to go ‘poof’ in the air! You need to earn that right, you hear!”

“You’re just a freeloader. Just a stinking foreign freeloader, who comes over here, happy to go poof on our lawns! Oh, you don’t go poof on your lawns, do you? No no no… You have to keep your lawns nice and clean, but you come over here and look at us like trash, and you’re happy to go prancing around like show ponies, with your flash camera going poof poof poof poof! You pack your bags full of them, don’t you? Poofers! So you can try and poof every lawn in Zootopia. Well, I say no! I’m taking a stand. There’ll be no poofs on my lawn.”

“I sowwy,” Jack said, shaking his head. “I don’t know why you think I like going kissy kissy with other boys…”

“WHAT! You’re a homophone too! Pah! This is the twenty first century milladdy, we’ll have none of that stuff with you. You know what I think? I think you homophones should be beaten up and booted out! With the thugs, the rapists, the thieves, the Baazi’s, the speciesists, the gays, the lesbians, the queers, the methodists…”

“Do you know way to train station?”

Nick paused, sitting down to think, only for Judy to step up and talk to Jack. “Where should I put these clothes?” she asked, looking down to some costumes she was carrying.

“Quiet young lady,” Nick scoffed, looking down at her. “Go back to the scullery, and take them with you! They need starching, washing, destarching, mangling, mincing, boiling…”

“Just down there will be fine,” Jack interrupted, suddenly speaking normally again.

Judy nodded, walking over, while the hare looked over at Nick. The fox looked back, before his eyes went wide with realisation. “Oh my god!”

“What is it Nick?” Judy asked, looking up.

“Just then!” he said, suddenly awash with a giddy mix of excitement and hope. “Just then, exactly what I’ve been talking about! Playing that crazy old mammal routine with Jack, and you come along, and I keep playing it.” He looked between the two lagomorphs. “I just got lost in the act! Just like I’ve been talking about!”

Jack smiled. “Now we have to help you learn to turn it  _ off _ ,” he said, snapping his fingers for emphasis.

Nick smiled happily, his tail giving an excited wag. “And then, I use that knowledge to turn off the act I’ve been stuck playing for all these years.”

Jack and Judy looked at each other and nodded, before getting to work. Judy went off to get dressed, while Jack changed in front of Nick. As he did so, he spoke. “By the way, when I was saying those things to ‘insult’ your character, what were you thinking? Did you feel the insult? Did they hurt, or outrage?”

Nick shook his head. “I felt… or I thought, ‘boy, what can I do with this!’ It was all a fun sort of game reallyt. Playing a character, it feels good.”

Jack nodded before returning to his new costume. He put on a pair of brown tweed trousers, a big brown tweed suit jacket over a white shirt and bowtie, before a tweed trilby finished it off. He stepped around with an arrogant swagger, checking his pocket watch once before slipping it back into his pocket. “Name’s Douglas Allen,” he said with a similar accent to chief Bogo’s, his voice quick, clipped and frank. He sounded serious, and with scant concern for others. “Now I’m here because the coppers tore into my old mob a few months back. No gang, no place to be in, no wages, and a mammal has to pay the rent. Now, I could just let myself get called up into the army, we have the war going on right now, but I’m not the kind of guy who wants to fight for some ponces in high back chairs, smoking their cigars all day, you hear?” He paused, opening his jacket and looking up. “I fight for me on my terms only. Now, I got a good consignment of rationed goods off the back of a lorry not too long ago. No questions answered, so none asked, you understand? Things like sugar mainly. Now, the common mammal doesn’t have much these days, so I’m here to help them out, in exchange for a nice return of course. Your job? I need a scrappy red tail to scan around, give me a tap on the shoulders if a copper turns up. Think you can do that?”

“So, I’m your business partner.”

Jack’s eyes narrowed, and he puffed himself up slightly. “Lookout. Don’t get above your station, and don’t mess up. Got it!?”

“I do. I won’t,” Nick replied, segueing into a sort of character himself.

“Good,” he said, a critical eye on the fox. “For your sake,” he said, the fingers on one paw flexing as he did so before swiping across his chin. “I do hope you’re right.”

Nick nodded, smiling as he did so. This whole acting thing was fun after all. Jack sat down on the edge of his set, his feet swinging below him, while Nick stood around. Looking over, he saw Judy approaching in an old light green housewives’ dress, a pale blue knitted fleece worn above it, with a dark green bowler like hat on her head. She looked over at Jack, glancing sideways as she did so, before stepping up to him. “Excuse me,” she said, her voice hushed. She glanced around a few times more, before stepping up next to him. “I’m… I don’t mean to bother you sir, but… Well, my son, bless his heart, he’s got shore leave, and it’ll be the first time I’ve seen him in years. It’s his birthday too, and I just want to make this special for him… We have some blueberry bushes at home, but for his favourite pie recipe they need sweetening of course…. Shame that sugar is rationed, and my hubby always uses it up in his tea. I don’t suppose you’d be able to help?”

Jack looked around awkwardly before speaking in a loud, exceptionally obvious, voice. “I… have… no…. Sugar…” he said, giving a glaringly obvious wink as he did so.

Judy backed off a bit and glanced around, tensing up before hurriedly walking away. “Sorry to bother you,” she rushed out, much to Jack’s alarm.

“Hey! HEY! Birdie! I don’t think you understand! I!  _ DON’T! _ Have! Sugar!”

Judy just scanned around some more, her ears up on high alert. “I think someone’s coming,” she said, “I’ve got to go!” She lifted up the hem of her dress before speeding off, leaving Nick and Jack alone.

The fox couldn’t help but shake his head. “Okay, out of character for a second, what was that?”

Jack shrugged. “Well, honestly, I’m not sure how to really act that archetype one-hundred percent…”

“Couldn’t you look it up?” Nick asked.

Jack paused, his mouth twitching to the side. “It’d probably take too long,” he dismissed. “Not really a good use of my time or anything.”

“I thought you liked acting?”

“I  _ live _ for acting,” he said proudly. “But not for history or research. I had to do enough of that in school.”

“Right,” the fox continued. “I just thought you’d want to try and get it right, rather than just mumbling through…”

“Mr Wilde, mumbling through usually has a very good success rate and excellent results,” he pointed out firmly, a grin growing on his face. “After all! I’m usually  _ very _ good.”

Nick paused to think, before shaking his head. “Okay, yes, fair enough. But…”

“Also,” Jack pointed out, “I thought that this character, being an ex-goon… ex muscle, so he wouldn’t be that skilled with words. He’s the kind of mammal who, up until a few years ago, got his way very nicely by beating mammals up. Others would then handle the distribution and retail side of everything, but they’re gone now. It’s just him! The whole idea of his story is him having to cope with the whole spiv experience, succeeding and failing wherever possible.”

“Right,” Nick said, suddenly nodding with interest. “That would be an interesting story for him. Is he figuring it out himself, or is he getting a mentor figure.”

“Trial and error,” Jack replied, before shaking his head. “But it doesn’t help that he has to deal with bad customers like her.”

Nick scoffed slightly.

Jack smiled. “I beg your pardon?” he asked quietly, a grin growing on his muzzle.

Nick shook his head before walking forwards, a finger raised. “You don’t get bad customers, Jack. Doesn’t work like that.”

“I think it does,” he replied. “How obvious do you have to be? I was flagging her as hard as I could. I mean seriously, how else would you do it.”

Nick felt what was almost a pang of sympathy for Jack, like one you might get for a duckling (sentient or non-sentient) that kept on swimming into a wall again and again, always hitting its head. “Maybe try being a bit less obvious?”

Jack froze for a second. “Eh?”

“Let me put it this way,” Nick said, “that kind of mammal doesn’t want you to come off as a creep or anything. But you were.”

“How else could I let her know, advertise myself, when my character is breaking the law.”

“You’re letting her know that you broke the law,” Nick explained. “Not a good idea.”

“But the whole point of me is that I’m breaking the law!”

“So,” Nick replied, sitting down and wrapping his paw around the hare. He was so going to mentor this guy. “That’s why you give them a bit of plausible deniability.”

“Go on…”

“Yes, she probably knows you broke the law. You stole some rationed sugar, and are now hawking it off on the black market. But, and this is the key here, you act kind and with a smile like you’re her friend. Maybe she knows you’re up to something, but guess what? You seem like a swell guy, so it’s probably not that bad! So, she doesn’t feel guilty using you.”

“So, she thinks it’s a victimless crime.”

“Yeah,” Nick said, smiling proudly. “And the great thing about those crimes is that you don’t hurt anyone! No-one to feel guilty about harming. Given that you’re helping the common mammal here, you then become a good guy! A little local hero. The underdog. You’re sticking in to the Mam!” He paused for a second, before shrugging. “Of course, there’s always bigots and moral busybodies who’ll look down at you, but they’d never come to you anyway. This way, though, you hook up mammals like your mark there. Hook, line, and sinker.”

“Whereas of course, I robbed and killed an innocent driver with a wife and three kits at home,” Jack replied, flexing one of his muscles. “Maybe even adding some torture in there, hmmm…”

“So maybe not a victimless crime,” Nick noted. “Even if you did something better, like managing to mess with some booking papers, or just sneaking out the sugar, there’d still be a victim.”

Jack shrugged. “Guess you can’t make it a victimless crime. Would it be even worth it?”

“I’d say,” Nick replied. “It’s nice to make every mammal happy.”

Jack smiled and gave a shrug. “Next thing, you’ll be saying that it’s worth finding some loopholes to make it not a crime period. Can’t imagine a nutjob like that.”

Nick’s fur bristled and he looked at Jack, feeling a bit insulted. “There’s standards out there,” he said. “Don’t be envious at the mammal sticking higher up the ladder.”

“It just seems a bit pointless. Too much work.”

“That’s because you’re lazy,” Nick snarked. “All it takes is a little bit of research, a bit of legal loophole finding, some box ticking, and  _ voila _ ! Victimless crime becomes victimless not-crime!”

“So a regular business you can be proud of?”

“Yeah,” Nick said, smiling as he did so. “And have fun at when you show all those busybodies that you’re perfectly legal!”

“So you had fun and are proud of all your hustles?”

“Yeah,” Nick said, smiling. “Of course I am, I’m an….” He froze suddenly, his eyes going wide with horror, before he gulped. Hard.

.

…

“Nick?” Jack asked.

…

“I…” the fox began saying, before he shook his head to snap himself out of it. “Ooops! There I go! Getting lost in a role there,” he joked, giving a loud and exaggerated laugh, full of audible ‘ha’s.

“Are you sure?” Jack asked.

“Certain, yeah!” he defended urgently, though he couldn’t help but conceal the slight panic rising in his voice. Just this morning, he was thinking that he was getting the hang of stopping his old ways of speaking. Of acting. Of being that hustler, of the same breed that could lead to that fox he’d seen on the undercover mission. But now… But then… -No, it was all just him getting lost in the act he and Jack were playing, wasn’t it?

“I do remember you personally saying ‘Let’s go out of character for a moment’. Don’t you?”

Nick gulped, hard. He did remember that. He’d shifted out but, on seeing Jack’s terrible understanding of hustling, he’d stepped back in. Pulled him under his wing. Been happy, proud even, to raise him up. Mentor him. Rub off on him, even though that part of him shouldn’t exist. It was all and act he was lost in, wasn’t it?

“When I referred to Judy as a bad customer, how did you feel?”

“I… -Well, a bit irritated that you’d think that, as it goes against how a good hustler should operate…”

Jack smiled. “You felt personally insulted.”

“As part of the act!” Nick blurted out. “As part of the act that I, since I was forced into it as a kit, have been lost in.”

Jack looked at him, thinking. “When you were playing the old guy and I insulted you, you felt a bit of joy at being able to play off that. Didn’t you?”

“Maybe, I…”

“And now, I insult you like this, and you not only feel super insulted, you go about fixing me and extolling the virtues of your own brand of that lifestyle!”

“Yeah…!” Nick choked out, “but… but…”

He froze as he felt a paw on one of his own and, looking down, he saw Judy standing there. “What we’re trying to say, Nick, is that you weren’t lost in an act. You were a hustler. That was a part of your life. It’s part of you, and it’s…”

She broke off as Nick pulled away sharply, a fearful look on his face. He shook his head hard. “No,” he said defiantly.

“It’s okay Nick. There’s nothing wrong with it!” Judy urged, the fox managing to look up at her, though he still seemed jittery.

“Can I just think this through!” he spurted out. “Alone. For a sec?”

“If you want,” Judy said, “but…”

He pulled away and jumped off the stage, quickly darting past Buster Moon. None of them had noticed the happy koala coming down that way. “Good news!” he announced. Judy felt caught, her attention between him and a rapidly retreating Nick. She looked over to Jack, spotting a very tired and irritated look on his muzzle as he groaned like a teenager. “With the very generous auction bid offered for old Sylvester…”

“Sylvester?” Judy asked.

“The obviously fake sarcophagus,” Jack grunted.

“We now have enough funds to secure our theatre’s life for another year!”

While still nervous about Nick, Judy couldn’t help but smile and look down at him. “That’s nice…”

“Wait for it,” Jack warned quietly, rolling his eyes as he did so.

“So, I was thinking we could use this time to create a new happy play!” He stepped up onto the stage, wandering by a bank of controls for both the giant centre set and the rest of the stage. “I was thinking that more people would enjoy  _ Les Miserables _ if it was, well… A nice bit less sad. After all, everyone loves coming to the theatre for some fun, don’t they? So, Jack, after this play, which I think we can both agree is just a little bit too gritty and dark, you can go and write that.”

…

The Jackrabbit was silent, looking over at Judy and yawning.

“Isn’t it a wonderful idea, Jack?”

“I’d have thought you’d be irritated by this,” she whispered, going up to him.

“Very,” he replied, his tired eyes narrowing. “But after the first few times, I really can’t be bothered to be irritated anymore.”

“So, your laziness actually does trump your pride,” she joked, bringing a little laugh from the jackrabbit. A laugh that was spotted by Buster Moon.

“That sounds like a yes!” he cheered, jumping up and down. Jack’s palms quickly covered his face, letting out a loud slap as they did so, and so he missed what happened next. Moon, jumping up and down, slipped slightly and stumbled backwards, right into a control panel. He then fell to the side, switching and pressing everything in his path before falling to the floor. Parts of the stage, the centre set, curtains… Everything began moving and shifting. Alarmed, Jack and Judy bolted upright, their lagomorph instincts sending them scanning around left and right, but not down.

Meaning they were taken by surprise as a trapdoor opened up beneath them, the pair falling into an understage. Landing on a mattress, they were only slightly confused, and recovered quickly enough to hear a long series of mechanical bangs, screams, strains, and groans rumbling above them. Jack cringed down hard as a loud series of crashes came from above, flinching down with each one. The room shook as everything above them seemed to tumble down, ending with the pair being launched up suddenly as something landed on the mattress behind them.

They fell back into something hard and white, jammed into each other.

Jack stood up, frowning. “Well... I know where the tavern’s kitchen sink ended up,” he said, gesturing to the porcelain basin they were in.

The thing shifted and moved, the whole floor rising up as they were lifted back out onto the main stage. Jack took one look at the ruins of his play’s set, before both of his ears came down to cover his eyes.

Judy gave a quiet and nervous laugh.

Buster Moon stumbled over, looking up at it. “Ummm… Good news… We could scrap this now, or we could, maybe, possibly… Spend the money from the auction on repairs.”

“We  _ will _ spend the money on repairs,” Jack said firmly, his voice thick with irritation. This time there was absolutely no indication that his assertiveness was a joke.

“Oh, uhh….” All three of them then turned towards the seats, as a new voice spoke out. Nick. “I’ll um….” he said, looking at the chaotic mess in front of them. He paused, pointing out of the door. “I’ll go get a mechanic or someone. That sound good?”

“That sounds quite  _ excellent _ , thank you,” Jack said, his voice going hard and authoritative again.

Nick nodded, snapping a picture, before making his way out. “I’ll be back soon.”

.

.

Out in the street, in the open air, Nick took a deep breath. He felt a bit guilty, to be honest. He could have just had his personality crisis by himself, on his own, and not bring anyone else into it. But no. While waiting outside, he’d had to have wish for an act of god or something to distract him and the almighty, in his infinite wisdom, had provided an elephant-scaled  _ deus ex machina _ \- or was it a  _ diabolous ex machina? _ .

Honestly, he still wasn’t sure what had occurred, he’d just heard a lot of grinding and bangs. Not so much like a car getting crushed, but maybe like a car crusher getting crushed?

He shook his head, he didn’t know.

What he did know though was that his mechanic offer was a spur of the moment thing that he really should have thought through, and that he was now beginning to regret. He was stuck with two problems, A: his personality crisis was segueing back into his mind, and B: he needed to find a mechanic who could handle that mess and  _ wasn’t _ the obvious choice that he already knew.

He closed his eyes, trying to think, only to come up blank every time.

“Rut me,” he grunted, as he brought his phone out to book a Zuber. Obvious choice it was, and he was pretty sure that Karma was laughing at him. Not only was he going to have to go  _ there _ , he was in the middle of exactly the kind of thing that would make the already slim chances of getting that mammal to help him vastly vastly worse, and all the while rubbing salt in the wounds of what he was feeling and dealing with. He’d snapped a picture to prove there was a problem, but he’d have to meet this mammal in person.

“Right then,” he said. “Dentist etiquette. Mind our own business, don’t make small talk, avoid eye contact, try not to bite bits off in frustration… Let’s get this over with, Skye.”

.

**.**

.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: So there’s Jack for you, and soon Skye. It’d certainly be interested to hear opinions on this version of Stripes, and on the rest of the chapter for that matter. Feel free to like, subscribe and review, and see you guys next time.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: For those unaware, the ending chapters of these fics will often have 'after credit' scenes. So, make sure to always scroll down all the way, else you miss something. Also, thanks once again to my proofer, Dancou-Maryuu.**

**.**

**Chapter 4**

.

As his Zuber passed through the underdeveloped woods and fields that marked the boundary between Savanna Central and the Rainforest District, Nick's mind was awash with strife. He couldn't help but stare morosely at his open paws.

Hustlers paws…

On a hustler fox.

Who was proud of it!

It wasn't an act he was lost in, it wasn't an old part of him, it was something he felt and lived and…

He groaned, his fingers flexing slightly. He felt dreadful, disgusting, like a guilty criminal. After all, he hadn't changed, had he?

But had he?

He was a cop! He was a good mammal, who'd turned his life around, and…

-And yet, it didn't explain that little slip up he'd done just there. Staring out the window, as they passed through the small strip of old countryside that had been saved from the growing city districts, his mind wandered. It had been so easy, hadn't it? To slip back… Was that what it was like for those bears, or that fox? Just a casual slip into evil, that you couldn't even feel?

It made him sick.

He and they were even more similar than he'd thought.

Was there even a point to all this?

.

.

.

"We're here."

"-Right," Nick muttered, barely roused from his emotional stupor but still remembering where he was and who he was seeing. "That…" Putting on a smile, he thanked the driver, paying him and seeing him off. Turning to face his destination, he let out a long whistle.

It had been years since he'd last seen this place and, while it had changed, it had changed in exactly the way he'd expect it to. Walking over to the mechanics shop, he passed a whole assortment of old vehicles and machines on display. Out front, there was an ancient steamroller that Nick swore hadn't been there last time. Looking to the side of the building, where several agricultural sheds had been laid out, there were easily more vehicles than he remembered from last time. A worrying number of them were ex-military. Trucks, jeeps and motorcycles, he could deal with, but a four-barreled anti-air gun? One that looked to be in working condition?

He shook his head, dismissing his concerns about her, the ones he had about himself immediately flooding back into the gap. The fox's face furrowed. "Hello darkness my old friend," he grunted as he walked through the door, almost satisfied going back to the old Nick snark now that he knew that trying to better himself was futile. Naturally he then felt a flash of guilt, for doubling down on the old Nick snark which he was supposed to be getting rid of.

He closed his eyes, breathed in and out, and calmed himself down. "Smile, Wilde, you want her to help, don't you?" He managed to slip his hustlers mask back on quite comfortably as he pressed the service bell, no-one being at the desk. Looking around, this part was just as he remembered. A cheap but functional reception, pretty utilitarian with the exception of a few dreamcatcher decorations that hung up here and there. There were some magazines on the desk too, mainly mechanic ones like _Socket Wrench Monthly_ and _AutoTrend_ , but also tech ones like _LINKED..._...

Looking closer at the last one, Nick saw a picture of a relatively famous onager (or wild ass) tech entrepreneur with platinum fur and a long mane, who specialised in artificial intelligence. Nick had heard of him a few before, most recently thanks to Judy. Through her social media feed, the rabbit had found out that he'd been seen dating a local red panda, which had earned the poor girl a bit of online abuse, in doing so setting off the justice Bun. That had all died down now, regardless, and Nick refocussed on the task at paw.

He could hear cheery music coming out of the building's workshop and, looking through an open door, he spotted a car above an inspection pit, being worked on from below.

It was her.

Nick could hear her singing along, badly but happily, and completely missing the bell. He pressed it again and, as the music stopped and the mammal began getting ready to come over, he moved over to a waiting chair and sat down.

Alone with his thoughts…

Honestly, rather a bad move.

"Hi!" came a chirp from the other side, as the door opened. "How may I…"

Nick got a look at the mammal now standing in front of him. She was a swift fox, sandy yellow fur covering her body, and she was dressed in a pair of stained denim dungarees, a tool box in one paw.

Nick managed a brief smile and a wave of a paw at the vixen. "Hi Skye."

She blinked a few times, while her ears folded back against the back of her head, a definite 'not this crap again' look growing on her face. She took in a calming breath, before giving a little smile back as she walked to her desk. "Long time no see," she said, politely enough but with no real warmth or joy.

If Nick were in the mood, and had he not needed her help, he would have teased her. About her missing him, or getting damned by faint praise. The last one almost came out of his muzzle, old Nick ready to jump back out and joke sarcastically about his feelings, but he kept it in. Partly due to still holding onto his self-improvement drive, however dumb and futile that was, but mainly because Jack still needed his stage fixed. In the end, he just said: "I could say the same thing."

She nodded. "So then. You're a cop now. Saved the predators…" There was a shrug, then a faint smile. "Guess I'll say thank you."

"No worries."

There was a brief pause, her eyes narrowing. Skye pulled up a finger, drawing it up with her paw so it pointed at the ceiling, before letting it swoop back down, aiming it right at Nick. "Not that I can say the same thing about you." She was frank. No-nonsense. That part hadn't changed. "You're all angsted up so much, I can feel it spreading to me," she commented, before crossing her arms and rolling her eyes hard, finishing it off with a large smirk. "I'm feeling irritated and a little fed up already."

Nick sighed, pinching the bridge of his muzzle. "Listen, I'm not in a good mood right now so…"

"-AH!" she exclaimed, before her eyes narrowed even more at him. "Knew it." He winced as he realised he'd messed up. Badly. Skye, meanwhile, had her toolbox out and was sifting through it. "Now, I tend to specialise in fixing problems," she said. " _Real_ problems that really exist and thus can be fixed. So, I'm afraid you're out of luck, Nicky…"

"Listen, I…"

"I mean I could try," she offered, a fun smile flashing across her muzzle. "But five to ten years for assault…" She pulled out a heavy wrench, wiggling it in front of Nick before placing back with a shrug. "Ehh….. Even if it does work, you're not really worth it." She picked up her toolbox again, giving Nick a quick wave, before heading back into her workshop. "Nice meeting up again!"

"Skye!" he urged, racing after her. She paused at the door, turning on the spot and looking at him sceptically. "Listen, I do have a real life problem you can fix. It's a big job, but you should be able to do it," he explained. "I may also be going through some of the... _-stuff…_ -that you don't like… but this has nothing to do with that!"

She paused, thinking. "Okay then, what is it? -The mechanic stuff, not your mumbo jumbo stuff."

"Here, let me show you," Nick replied, bringing out his phone and showing her the picture he'd taken of the ruined set. Her eyes went wide as they landed on it, before she took the phone from him and studied it. Her tail swished a few times, and her paw tapped along the side of her muzzle, happy humming noises coming out of her.

"Ooooh!" She cooed, intrigued. "Let me guess, giant massive failure?"

"Yup."

"Everything colliding together?"

"Looks like it."

"Nice. They didn't even have an interlocking system to prevent that?"

"I'm guessing the answer is no. If they had something to prevent it, I'm guessing it would have prevented it."

She looked over it all one last time, before handing the phone back. "Useful again," she said, patting Nick's shoulder. "Twice in one lifetime, you're gonna have to keep this up!"

"Thank you," he snarked, doing his best to ignore her as she grabbed her toolbox and raced back into her workshop, grabbing more tools. Rubbing his forehead, annoyed that the taunting thoughts were coming back in, he closed his eyes to try and focus. Drive them out.

"Got a ride?"

"No, I came in a Zuber…"

"Right, I'll get my bike out. You can ride on the back." She popped around the corner again, a helmet on her head and a second in her other paw. She tossed it at him before waving him on. "Where we going?"

"Moon's Theatre," he said, as she nodded.

They stepped out, and she locked the door. "Sure we can't take a car?" he asked, as they walked around to a parking lot at the back. A high powered old-school motorbike was waiting there, Skye already stowing away her toolbox and wheeling it out. She looked up at Nick and patted on the back seat. "-You have plenty of those, don't you?

"I do," she said, smiling back at him. "But I'm just in a biking mood today."

Nick reluctantly put on his helmet and mounted the bike. No point arguing with her.

"Anyway, you're in one of your 'everything is crap' moods today," she said, almost whimsically. A slightly devious look grew on her face. "This way, you can't bother me with it!"

"It's not one of those," Nick clarified. "It's a 'I was a bad mammal in the past and I can't get away from it' mood."

Almost immediately Skye snapped around to face him. "What do you mean, can't get away from it?" she interrogated.

Nick grumbled a bit. "I still joke around and blow people off like before I became a cop and, however much I try, I can't stop it. Worse, if push comes to shove I'm still a bit _proud_ of some of my hustles. I feel like I'm stuck as nothing more than a dirty con-fox."

Skye's head cocked slightly, an eyebrow rising, before her body suddenly relaxed. Shaking her head, she reached out and put her paw on his shoulder. "And here I was thinking you were going to say you were corrupt or something. You actually had me worried there."

Nick's eyes narrowed, but he stayed silent.

"Instead it's something… Well, new, certainly."

His eyes narrowed just a little bit more.

"Anyway, listen, Nick," Skye continued, the tone of her voice softening out, with a hint of compassion coming in. "I don't know why exactly I'm going to repeat this, but I'm going to do it anyway, despite knowing the definition of insanity. You are not 'just a fox' or just a 'dirty con-fox' or whatever, you are you - Nick Wilde; no more, no less."

Skye turned back forwards and started the engine as Nick's eyes widened with realisation, a sly grin growing on his muzzle. "Wait, no 'responsibility for your life' part?"

She glanced back. "I think the police thing took care of that already."

"Why Skye," he said, smirking. "Was that a…" He was cut off as the engine roared out and Skye took off, the pair racing back to Moon's theatre.

.

.

.

Pulling another bit of fallen debris off and into a safe place on the floor, Judy breathed out, rubbing her aching arms. She couldn't help but try her best at tidying the mess up, especially as she seemed to be the only one there who could be bothered to do it. Her gaze lingered on someone she thought would have at least a passive interest in helping out.

"... -What?"

She kept her eyes on Jack. The hare was laying back on the mattress that they'd risen up on, and which now was stuck here and wouldn't go down. Judy had to hold back the urge to shake her head in disappointment. "You could help," she said. "It's your production."

"We're going to get a mechanic who'll be moving stuff around anyway," Jack said, sitting up and shrugging his shoulders. "Why bother? Wasted energy..." He lay down again as Judy, looking up at the mess, resolved to double her efforts to tidy it up as much as possible. "-In any case, I'm thinking."

"About what?"

"Douglas Allen."

"Who?"

"My character from just now," he said. "I'm wondering, could I make him into the star of his own play? Or would he be a side character? What would his story arc be? Or… -hang on, he could be a great addition to 'Street Gang Family'. -That's one of my in-production scripts. Had the idea after seeing mafia films with all those crime family hierarchies. It got me wondering what it would be like to have that at the very bottom of the organised crime hierarchy. Would they be trying to rise up, or be going down? How would the family react? I mean, there's still lots to change and fill out and edit and all that. It'll be worth it to get some of the fun moments across for sure. You'd enjoy that one. If you wanted to be an actor again, I could make you the chief inspector!"

Pulling another heavy lump of metal, Judy turned to him and smiled. "Thanks Jack," she said, before pausing. "And Douglas Allen?"

"-Oh, right. Forgot about him. He'd be a side character in that. Maybe a secondary antagonist. Or a friend! But it would mean moving the setting and time period slightly. Lots of things I need to sort out..."

Judy nodded in agreement, before being distracted by the sound of the theatre doors opening, Nick calling out. "Judy, Jack? We're back."

Both stood up, watching as Nick and the new swift fox vixen walked up to meet them. "Judy, Jack, meet Skye. Skye, meet Jack and Judy." Greetings were exchanged, though they were cut short as the mechanic leapt up and began examining the whole mess. Letting out a long appreciative whistle, she shook her head. "Wow!"

"Yeah," Judy said, tutting. "We didn't see the collision itself, but it seems to have messed up all the systems beneath the stage too."

"Even some of the lights are bust," Jack added.

"Hmmm, massive chain reaction of failures... Purrphy's Law in full effect here!"

"You can say that again," Judy replied, before gesturing down to her sorting. "I tried to tidy it up, but I didn't get far."

"Ummmm," Skye paused, before shrugging. "I guess thanks," she replied, giving a thumbs up. Judy looked over to Jack and smirked, only to pause as the vixen carried on. "-I'm glad you care, but I'd rather have done the cleanup myself. Don't want to miss a clue or anything, or deal with someone else's mess up. It's the thought that counts though, so thanks again."

Rolling her eyes at the very proud grin on Jack's face, Judy turned back to Skye. "Well, they were only loose bits that seemed to be ready to fall off. And you're right, you gotta try!"

The vixen nodded, before stepping forwards to examine something. "Yeah, your production after all."

"Actually it's Jack's," she said. "Nick and I came here on a visit."

Glancing up, Skye looked at her for a few seconds before her eyes widened. "Judy Hopps?"

Jack smirked. "In the mammal, yes."

"Makes sense now," the swift fox said, smiling. "Thanks for the whole Night Howler thing."

A wide grin grew on Judy's muzzle as she crossed her arms. "Just Nick and I making the world a better place!"

Skye nodded, only to pause. "Is Nick your partner?" she asked. Judy nodded proudly, only for that to fade as the fox looked at her with pity. "Oh, that's… -interesting," she said, before shaking her head. She sounded genuinely concerned. "Listen, I… Well, hopefully you two get on great."

Judy's nose twitched a few times. "We certainly do get on great," she said defensively. "He has a few little issues, but he's good and I'm happy to help."

Skye looked at her curiously, before looking back over the rest of the room. "I guess you'll be happy to go off and find him then."

"I…" the bunny doe began, only to pause. Glancing around, she saw no Nick. "Right! Yes..." She leapt off the stage, running off with the hope of finding him. Jack and Skye were left alone, the vixen turning back to the stage set, the jackrabbit leaning back and watching her.

"I guess you and Nick have a history?"

Still looking around, she shrugged. "A rather big one. Let's just leave it at that."

He shrugged. While curious, he wasn't really feeling the need to probe her that much. Instead, he walked forwards, looking over the wreckage with her, the pair side by side. "You can thank my idiot boss for messing this up," Jack said, making her roll her eyes.

"Looks like an idiot boss job," she said with a chuckle, nodding her head as she stepped back and took it all in. "Then again, I might thank him… -I was in the mood for a challenge!"

His paused, looking at her. "I'd call a challenge a bad thing," he observed, crossing his arms. "But, good for you, I guess!"

Turning around, the vixen looked at him and smirked.

He looked back, confused. "What?"

"Nothing," she replied, shaking her head. "You're just… a bit of a character, shall we say."

His fur bristled slightly and he stood up tall, even his ears going upright. "I'm not just 'a bit of a character', Skye."

" _Sure_ you're not," she replied happily. "And you're not making it worse, either."

"Right now, I'm not playing any character, I'm just being Jack Savage," he boasted proudly, eyes closed. "I am just me!"

Skye chuckled a bit and, as she leaned in to observe something, she happened to glance back and see a little grin flicker across his muzzle, escaping out. She thought it a bit interesting, before turning back to the job at paw, something which was far more so.

.

Out in the lobby, Nick paced around, scratching his head and deep in thought. With Skye dealt with, he was able to go back and rack his brain, running over his current mental crisis. Who was he, exactly?

What was he?

A good mammal?

A bad one?

When he'd planned to move on, cut himself from his old past and change himself, he looked forward to it. As a cop, Nick felt more free and happy than he'd ever done, and had grown from a mammal that always hid behind his hustler's mask to one who was getting ever more used to taking it off. Dropping those sarcastic hangups, and the last remnants of his cynical nature, were going to be the roof on his tower of redemption.

But he'd just had the foundations ripped from under him and everything, all that he'd worked on, now lay in a heap of rubble. He felt just like that too.

But should he?

He groaned slightly, pulling down his ears in frustration and even letting out a little growl. "Is it too much to ask for something freaky to distract me?" He asked, shaking his head. "Some new conspiracy, or another jumper to talk down, or some eldritch horror to…"

The tod trailed off, his ears folding back as he glanced at the pair of disturbing yellow statues that stood on display.

"On second thoughts, scratch that last one," he mumbled, walking away. "That's too far."

Evacuating himself from the area swiftly, he found a chair to sit himself down at and leant forwards, paw massaging his brow. What was he? Policemammal? Confox? Actor? Angsty idiot?

Or was it like Skye said, was he just Nick Wilde, with that being the be-all-end-all? Was he just a police mammal who was once a hustler? Maybe if he could rant this to his therapist he could…

…

"Oh Mother Marian," he said, getting a letter out of his pocket. On the front it read ' _open in case of existential crisis',_ and he dug one claw in before pausing.

"This was all a hustle, wasn't it?" he snarked to the air. Shaking his head, he opened the envelope and read what was inside.

.

" _Dear Mr Wilde,_

_I presume that the plan that Judy and I worked out together has come into operation, and that your assumptions about being lost in an act since you were a kit are now in doubt or proven false._

_My techniques are unusual, but I believe in both guiding mammals with straightforward advice and letting them learn things by themselves. The latter requires some creativity in certain, challenging, cases. However, let me now do the former. Let me guide and explain my observations to you._

_Throughout our time together, you have been someone focussed on moving away from the past. As you said, seeking redemption. All things can go too far though, and both Judy and I felt this way when you tried to change the way you speak and alter your personality. Maybe that was required previously, but not now. You strive and run from the past and to the future, but the past is not all bad. There is good there, and good in you, and it's important to recognise, accept and even cherish that._

_Your 'lost in the act' theory was interesting, and I do believe that it may have been true to begin with. But, over time, you became this 'hustler Nick', and the old you merged with it. If you were struggling to get out of the act, it was because there was no act to get out of. We just needed to let you learn this for yourself._

_More importantly though, ask yourself this. Was the mammal you were the day before that mission a good one? A bad one? I believe he was good. Rough around the edges, yes, but that's who you are, and it's what a lot of people like about you. There was never anything wrong with that, ever. Your partner befriended you, quirks and all, and seeing you trying to strip those quirks, take away what was special about yourself, hurt her. Not just because she likes you, but she saw self-destructing, self-hating behaviour and, naturally, it made her terribly nervous._

_I can't tell you how to live your life, or dictate how you should act, but I can say this; the Nick Wilde I knew before the incident at the Daycare was a good mammal and a good friend. My advice, Nick, is to try and find peace with yourself, with your past, and with who you are._

_You aren't a hustler, or a cop. You're Nick Wilde._

_Feel free to contact me if you need any more help._

_Dr Lupuleli._

_._

Nick put the letter down and breathed out.

He felt…

.

.

…

"Okay…"

"Nick!"

His ears flicked up and he looked over to see a concerned Judy, as it hit him just how worried she'd been for him lately. She stepped over next to him, holding out a paw, and he let his move forwards into hers, the touch staying his mind and calming him. It felt good.

He felt…

"-How are you feeling?"

"Good," he said, looking down and smiling. "Good."

And he was. He felt calm, he felt happy. He thought back to his hustler slip, and it felt natural. Okay... He had standards in his past! He was proud of them! Jack had outraged his hustler sense and that… that was okay. It was fine. In any case, it felt nicer than that 'self-destructing' thing that at least three females in his life couldn't stand. Maybe it all would be alright?

"You know," he said, chuckling slightly. "I was being a really dumb fox back there."

Judy rolled her eyes. "You can say that again."

"You know, I was being a really dumb fox back there."

He got a light punch on his leg in response and couldn't help but milk it.

"That's my best leg! My career… ruined! By a vicious bunny!"

"Sure you don't want to be an actor?" Judy said, smiling happily. Why wouldn't she be? She had her old Nick back! An old Nick who made her happy!

"I'm good thanks," he said as he stood up, an understatement if there was one. "I think I like being a cop quite enough, thank you very much."

"So do I, Nick," Judy said, nodding. "So do I."

Together, they headed back to the stage, talking as they went.

"Also, I _really_ need to refresh my hustling skills," he said.

"Oh. Why's that?"

"I may have missed a Grade A one being pulled by a certain bunny. Or should I say bunnies!" He paused, looking down deviously. "Don't tell Skye, but we foxes have our reputation to uphold."

Judy chuckled, only to pause in thought. "Say, what's up with you and Skye?"

Nick froze slightly, before taking a deep breath in. He felt a bit of apprehensiveness, it was an old and personal story. Before, he would have struggled to get it out, but now...

"We dated for a bit in our last years of school," he explained, the words coming out calmly and with no issue. "But she dumped me rather quickly."

"There's more than that, I'm guessing?"

He nodded, feeling fine to go on. "Skye was a year younger than me and her birth parents, the Fawkes', actually lived near my old home. They were a real bad bunch though, drugs and fighting, you name it. She was still a baby when social services took her away, and she was adopted by a military family elsewhere. Later on, her new father - a fox - caught cancer. He survived, but he had to take a medical discharge. He ended up as a shop teacher in our school, and that's how we met again…"

"Right..." Judy said, still unsure of where this was going.

Nick sensed her confusion and knelt down to her level. "I'm telling you this because, as far as she was concerned, she had 'the harder youth'. She was the one with the worst deck of cards at the beginning and, if foxes supposedly got a bad hand from society, she'd logically be the worst one off between the two of us. However, her father, a fox, was a popular teacher. She had good grades, good prospects, she was going places. Me though… -Remember the speech I gave you after you found out about my jumbo pop hustle?"

The bunny nodded. "You can only be what you are."

"Yup," Nick sighed. "Back then I lived by that mantra, and I preached it, trying to convince her. She didn't buy it though and, at first, she tried to drill some sense into me, before eventually giving up and being unable to stand me. By the end, all Skye saw was a fox moping around, saying he was traumatised by a 'one-off' bullying incident and milking it for all it was worth. To her, I was toxic tod who complained about all the stereotypes of his species, exaggerating them a hundred times over to mask his failures, all while being a giant hypocrite and doing all he could to promote those stereotypes…" He took a breath in, and then out… That had all been, fine! Happy with himself, he then looked over at Judy and flashed a smile. "So as a judge of character, you've gotta give her credit."

Managing to stifle a laugh, the bunny shook her head, only for a sad look to come over her. "But that wasn't a little incident though, was it? You were mute for a while…"

"A while before I met her," he said, scratching his head. "When I did, it was long ago and the damage done. She didn't know."

Judy looked on, still a bit sceptical. "Still she could be a bit less…"

"Hostile to me?" Nick asked. He gave a shrug. "Maybe. Maybe…"

She nodded. "Something I could work on," she muttered as they entered the main theatre. Jack was sitting down, watching Skye do some work. "We can always try," she said, as she briefly pictured the four of them hanging out together as good friends. "After all, we'd made a great group of four."

"Oh, I think we'd make a great foursome!" he said, turning to Judy and teasing her.

She just smiled back. It felt good to have her fox back. He felt good to be back to his old self, and to feel good about it! Jack felt good, seeing his project being put on track, and Skye was happy having a new one. Sure, there was work to be done, the bunny reminded herself. She'd have to have a talk with Skye a bit later, trying to convince her to give Nick a second chance. He had changed, after all, but thankfully not too much. With her help, he'd worked it all out. Things were good, and she just wanted to savour that for a little. She felt like nothing could possibly ruin this moment.

…

_Beep-Beep Beep-Beep Bee..._

Judy's ears shot up as her phone rang, and she quickly answered it. "Yes, Chief? It's our… -Understood." Putting her phone away, she looked at Nick gravely. "The Chief wants us in his office," she said. "They've just discovered that someone has been stealing Night Howlers."

Nick gulped, before his face hardened. Out came his sunglasses, flicked out and placed on his face. "Those guys better watch out then. Old Nick is back in town."

Judy flicked hers out too. It was time to make the world a better place again.

.

.

.

**An: And so we come to the end of 'Acting out' and everyone's favourite purple flower is back in play. But how, why, where? Feel free to speculate and comment, before finding out more next week in 'Elementary introductions'.**

**Follow the full series 1 on fanfic, or the FFoZ collection on A03, to make sure you don't miss it.**

**.**

**Anyway… Wooo! This 'oneshot' (fourshot) took a ton of work to get right. It doesn't help that this is the first, and thus most important, fic of the project. It has to be great and top notch, to hook readers in. I've never liked doing intro chapters/ fics, and I did a lot of agonising over lots of details here.**

**Working out how to place the undercover mission, in particular, was tough. At first I went straight into it, but then worried that this would put some people off. Then I tried an author's notes warning in front, then trying to ease people into it all with a future tv interview with Judy. I briefly tried having the therapy session come the day and chapter before the mission, which would be designed so you can skip it… In the end, I decided that the therapy session had to come (story wise) after the mission, so Nick could spell out his worries. This led to me moving the filing scene, originally between the mission and therapy (and where Nick sometimes made the connection between himself and that fox) to after it. After that, things went as I planned all along. Finally, I toned down the actions with Mrs and Mr Kuma, helping it fit closer to the tone of the rest of the fic. Of course, it still needed to be dark to begin with, given that it sets of Nick's self doubt.**

**This fic was all about introducing Jack and Skye, plus showing the undercover mission. Some eagled eyed viewers will have recognise the civvy helper there, and some of his friends will be making an appearance very soon. There were a ton of other easter eggs as well.**

**In the grand scheme of this story, Skye had a complex backstory that I laid out, and a personality and character that I quickly came up with. She's not the version of Skye from Embers of the Past and, though I thought about adding some of that Skye to this one, nothing much came of it. Jack meanwhile took a long time to work out/ come up with. I had his backstory, but his personality? I think I've come up with something unique, and it allowed a final addition to the series 1 plan which both gives him an arc, and Skye an extra one too (while supporting Judy's arc on top).**

**Given all that, it came almost as a surprise the Jack was easier and funner to write here than Skye. Then again, we'll see lots more of her coming up, and in some future fics I was able to really get her personality down.**

**As said before, we'll be seeing lots of smaller fics, each with their own internal story (such as Nick's personality crisis and its resolution, as seen here), but adding to the wider plot. As said before, on fanfic the next chapter will be posted after this, while on AO3 you can subscribe to the FFoZ series to get the next fic, 'Elementary introductions' when it comes out.**

**Hope you all enjoyed this. See you next time!**

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Dr Lupuleli flicked through her case notes slowly but carefully, reviewing them all as she went. This new task was not one to be taken lightly, and she had no intention of doing as such.

Pausing as she found one of particular…. strangeness, she turned to the mammal she'd invited over for an interview. It wasn't the first time they'd talked, that time had been when she was originally made aware of the patient in question, but she still wanted to make sure that everything was clear.

It all was, and after wrapping it up and being left alone, she could consider it all. Checking her emails though, she was distracted as one came up from Judy Hopps. Reading it, she smiled. The plan had worked, Nick was better. She'd been confident he would be.

She was less confident about her next patient though. Absentmindedly she remembered the mammal she'd just been interviewing, pushing for her to help this new patient, partly out of guilt but mostly due to a long and old relationship that had been greatly tested by the passage of time. Coming here, hoping that Amy could help the new charge out of her deeply speciesist ways, the Binturong hoped that she could.

Amy also remembered that the visitor had met Hopps and Wilde before. Probably best not to raise it though, given that said meeting was an arrest made at a certain asylum where fifteen missing mammals were being held.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

In a car, rolling along the warm streets of the canyonlands, a pair of big cats were talking to each other. A dark-furred Lion was driving and a vain looking tiger sat in the seat next to him, talking as they drove.

"So, we put a bid on that item of interest for the boss, but did it have to be one so substantial?"

"I'd say so," the Lion said. "The auction closes soon. We don't want anyone else coming in and outbidding us, do we?."

"I'd think we could pay half, maybe even a quarter, of what we did there and no-one would outbid us for that insulting homage. It's a lump of junk."

"It's not a lump of junk."

"Well, I disagree there. I say it is."

"No, it's not," the Lion said out loud before groaning. "I didn't take you for an idiot, but here we are. It's a religious artifact of great importance to the boss."

"Might be a thing of great importance to the boss," the tiger said, "but so is the other delivery that he just ordered and we just got! Both happen to be talentless frauds made in the mid-to-late last century."

"You talking about the delivery on the back seat."

"Is there another one? Is there?"

The lion chuckled. "That was a statement friend. Not a question."

"And it's a statement that we could pay a lot less than what we did, maybe split the money…"

"Excuse me! You're asking us to mess with the boss? You do know what happens to people who mess with the boss?"

"They send us out," the tiger boasted. "And there in is his problem."

The lion shook his head strongly. "No. Just no."

…

The tiger laughed, shaking his head. "Just toying with you, dear friend."

"Good. I really was beginning to think I was surrounded by idiots here."

...

"But it is a lump of junk," the tiger continued. "It's clearly not a real sarcophagus, probably some art made a few years ago." He paused, thinking and smiling. "I wonder what the ancient priests would think about that being made, inspired by their doomed religion."

"Doomed religion?"

"Doomed from the start," the tiger explained. "You see, the way I see it, doesn't a religion have to evolve to stay relevant? Now the ancient Egyptians, they were very specific about their gods. One for life. One for death. One for their big river... You have to agree that they wrote themselves into a corner right there."

"A corner," the Lion replied. "How so? In any case, shouldn't the exalted and religious be firm and clarified by default? If your god, the one in the sky who gave you life, gets messed around with and altered, can you really have that much faith in him? Faith to protect your everlasting soul as it traverses the valley of darkness? The sheep of the world need a strong, constant, regal god to rule them, don't they?"

"Well, lots of little adjustments are better than larger ones, are they not? Try replacing the recipe in cola, try doing it all at once. Now that's quite proven not to work. But what if they tweaked it over the years. A little here, a little there... They could change the whole coca cola recipe without us knowing."

"Now why would they do such a thing to such a national institution?"

"Because they can. They want to. Now, who's to say that the coca cola we're drinking now, is the very same coca cola that we were drinking when we were cubs?"

"Well I say and my faith says," the lion said. "That's what's lacking in you, faith. You have an utter lack of it."

"And the coca cola scientists have us all drinking new coke today, and none of us know!"

"No they're not."

"Who's to say?"

"I'm to say. I have supreme and almighty faith, that we are drinking old coke."

"But do you have old coke to prove it? To taste test against modern coke? Who's to say that the coca cola company hasn't been leading us on? They haven't abandoned new coke, so they snuck it in by stealth. We have all been hoodwinked, led on, and made to have supreme trust in the coca cola company, but they may have taken us all for a ride."

"All for a ride? Come on dear chap. If you're this worried, just stick to pawpsi cola! There's your new god for you. I'd know if coke had changed."

"Well I don't think so. Besides, does it matter? An undetectable change over half a generation. Now the Egyptian gods, meanwhile, they had an almighty god for their holy river and that river only. Now what would happen if they found a bigger river, I wonder? They'd need a new god for it, and he'll be bigger than their powerful nile god by proxy. Where would he fit into the existing mythology? Would he just arrive and make the Nile, the source of eternal life and prosperity, his bitch? They'd have to do a new coke for their faith, and that'll all fall apart. It's why we don't follow Horus or some of those other old bird gods, and why some cheap knock off sacreligious owl statue was built today, and we're after it."

The lion shook his head. "No, no, no... Think about it, the ancient Egyptian religion died of afterlife inequality."

"Afterlife inequality?"

"Getting past the giant pyramid and tomb, you needed some moronically expensive priest to pull out your organs and jar them, dissolve your brain and suck it out with a straw, cover you in salt from a lake… Not just regular plain easy to access salt from the sea, but elitist salt… and then wrap you up in bandages in a golden coffin in a decorated room with lots of curse-protected treasure, to have a chance! A chance! At making it! Where was the good afterlife for the common mammal? Where was his shot at eternal reward and paradise? He had none! That's why the egyptian religion died out. You always have to win the common mammal, the more ignorant and disorganised the better, over to your side with promises of wealth and glory, and that extends to religions too. The workers of the world need to think they have a shot at the means of redemption."

The tiger listened on, pulling out his tranq pistol to examine it as he did so. "Well, whatever happened, they're gone now and cheap knockoffs will be built of our their gods, and likely our gods in the future too."

"You mean like today? You mean like Pawpsi is to coca cola?"

"No…. Yes…. Maybe…."

"Besides," the Lion continued. "I don't think the owl thing is a knock off. Either way, the boss thinks it's valuable, and he put his bucks on it. A whole lot of bucks. The boss gets what the boss wants, and the boss wants this."

"Some cheap treat for the missus? She is the right species to be into that kind of stuff."

"I don't know," the lion pondered. "He'll be having the big guns taking the delivery. The real big guns."

"Like the Wolf?"

"Like Petey."

"Petey!" The tiger leant back, whistling. "Well I know that that's serious then. Maybe they're into that religion? Bringing it back?" He paused, before turning and leaning over the back of his seat, tranq still in paw, to look at their current delivery, a scraggly weasel trussed up in the rear of the car. "Say, do you believe that ancient gods and religion are still relevant and worthy of respect and adoration, even after…"

He was broken off as the car hit a bump, the tranq gun going off and the dart landing right between the weasel's eyes.

"YOU JUST SHOT WESSELTON IN THE FACE!"

"I JUST SHOT WESSELTON IN THE FACE!"

"WHY DID YOU JUST SHOOT WESSELTON IN THE FACE…?" The lion asked, before groaning. "Man. The boss doesn't have any friends in the canyonlands? What are we going to do? We're going to have lay low for ages now and hope everyone forgets us. Why did you even do that?"

"I didn't mean to shoot Wesselton in the…"

He broke off as a groan came from the back.

"It's… Weaselton," Duke managed to say, before passing out on the back seat.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Exiting the theater, after sorting out the deals of her contract, Skye stretched a little before heading off to where she'd parked her bike, singing as she went. "Oh, a wandering mechanic I…"


End file.
